Jibba Jabba

Read This, Not That

2011-10-10T11:44:00.004-04:00

Thinking about my taste in fiction, as I often do when browsing some of my favorite websites, I realize that there are certain scenarios that have me hitting the backspace button when attempting to find a good read. I rarely compromise on these terms and I've been lucky to find plenty of books without them. You might call them literary peeves. They are in order of least liked.

1. Prostitute, whore, escort

Call them what you will. I DO NOT understand the intrigue and phenomenon, especially in m/m fiction, for the young men (usually twinks) to sell their bodies. I didn't like it on the rare, rare, rare, rare occasion that it appeared in het romance or fiction and I don't like it now. I especially hate to discover that I've unknowingly purchased a book where the main character's 'occupation' was never mentioned in the blurb. I guess this avoidance stem's from an undying old-fashioned ideals of romanticism. I have, however, enjoyed stories where the characters were in the profession. But that was because their interactions were glossed over and most of them were no longer in the trade or attempting to get out of it.

2.Humiliation

I've read one book (well, half of one book) where one of the main characters got off on being called names, whipped with a belt, and punched in the face. CLEARLY this guy never got spankings and then whuppings in his childhood. The idea of being hit with a belt buckle makes me cringe. Nuff said.

3. Established relationships

I can count the number of books in romance I have read where the MCs were already together when the story started. This does not count sequels and trilogies. I like the excitement of the first hook-up, the thrill of attraction, the first blossoming of love to be written about. I reserve ERs for non-fiction, thrillers, scifi, etc.

4. M/F/M

I've long stopped being convinced that any man is willing to share his woman with another man and does not have latent attraction to another man. (I mean, I know I could be wrong but I like all things equal) Now, if you turn this into M/M/F I'm in.

5. 7,10,12,15 years later

I don't know why I have an aversion to second chance relationships. It happens. A lot. In real life. But they rarely pique my interest.

6. Bittersweet

If you tell me there is no HFN or HEA I'm out of there. Life is full of disappointments. I don't need it in my reading.

Forbidden Possibility

2011-10-09T18:51:00.007-04:00

At last there is a publisher up and coming with the cojones to publish subject matter that may not gel with mainstream media. This is freedom of speech and the written word at its best. It remains to be seen how well these guys do but I intend to throw my support their way. And you can too!

If you click on the picture below you will find a introductory video by the owners, which is pretty neat. A lot of times you never get to see the faces of the publishers. There is also an option to donate starting at as little as $3 that goes toward paying a legal representative to protect their first amendment rights. We all know, someone inevitably is going to be offended.

Free Website Frozen

2011-10-08T16:06:00.002-04:00

I just discovered that my freewebs site has been frozen due to adult material. At least, I am guessing it is because of adult material. They haven't gotten back to me yet. I have read the frequently asked questions forum and come to this conclusion since I can think of no other reason why they would freeze me. They don't even have the decency to let you know they froze your site. I was not aware that you couldn't post adult material (stories) on freewebs. Pornography yes. First amendment being squashed to pieces, no. So anyway, I am going to have to start uploading my stories at a new site. More information to come.

On the right track...at last.

2011-10-08T10:24:00.005-04:00

Hello all,

It has been a while since I posted anything. It's actually a good thing I haven't updated the blog because after about two dozen false starts on Brogan and Micah's story (Refuge) I have settled comfortably into their tale. Those guys are talking to me and talking LOUD! *bg* Readers are in for a big surprise/revelation about Micah. I am a little worried about how well his character will be embraced, but I hope to do him justice and prove a point to not only myself but others that being different (in the special way that Micah is) does not mean you can't fall in love and have a HEA. Anyway, I hope to be finished with this story by the end of November if not sooner. I've been dabbling with my other stories including reworking G-Strain. In order to re-release G-Strain I need to expand it, which will include cutting out more of Jared's POV and making it more about Kenano and Nurak. Then I'm thinking The Phirst Hunger will focus mostly on Jared And Dawa. You can expect the story to be wildly different than the first version which was written in my early, humbling days of 2007. (Wow, time flies). My writing style has changed quite a bit-- hopefully for the better.

So, in the absence of the fully polished and published manuscript of Refuge I wanted to post two of my scrapped beginnings.

The first one goes a little something like this:

Summer and Se7en

Micah St. Germaine lived for the summers. It was the only time he really felt free. Free from the constant harassment at school, the stray elbows that clipped him in the arm when people walked by, the feet that jutted out to trip him while he was carrying his lunch in the cafeteria and getting his test paper swiped so the other boys could copy his answers. And yet he couldn’t live in days of splendid sunshine and blissful peace forever. The school year was set to begin in less than a week.

Micah’s heart grew heavy.

He walked down familiar sidewalks with his head hanging low and his eyes cast down, watching as his feet chased after his shadow. He scowled unhappily at the outline of his bushy, curly hair, his thin shoulders and scrawny arms sticking out from where he’d tucked his hands into his pocket. He hated what he saw, hated what he was.

And he felt helpless to do anything about it. Hunching his shoulders as if cold, even though the weather was well into the eighties, Micah trudged the rest of the way to Studio Se7en mostly by rote memory.

Even before he went inside, the vibrations of a bass guitar greeted his ears on the other side of the scarred and chipped metal door. Micah jiggled the handle a bit—there was a trick to getting the door to open smoothly. Too many late nights (or early mornings), fueled by booze and diva attitudes had left the door with a mean dent right near the lock.

Well practiced, it didn’t take Micah long to let himself inside. He jogged up the long flight of steps that led to the main floor and walked bass the burnt sienna colored door that had long ago lost its restroom sign, he turned the knob on the black door.

Before he went into the main part of the studio he took a deep breath to compose himself. His mother had eyes like a hawk. If he even reeked of his troubles she would smell it. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to tell her that he was getting bullied at school. He had told her. What followed was the most embarrassing hour of his life.

His mother didn’t exactly look like a typical mom. It’d taken several minutes of explaining (his mom yelling at the principal) to get Principal Bernard and his assistant Henry Batcher to believe that the slender Caucasian female with blazing ice-pink bangs, nose ring, and a compliment of twelve earrings in her left ear, with tall kickass black boots, wearing an acid washed mini-skirt and a form-fitting tee that read, “I’m Easy Like Sunday Morning” was his mother.

It didn’t help that Micah was obviously mulatto, landing somewhere in skin tone between his mother’s pale white skin and his father’s hazel brown complexion.

Even after the principal had been convinced of Micah’s relations with Marilyn Struthers he hadn’t taken her accusations that he wasn’t doing enough to protect all the students at St. John’s middle school from kids like Bryan Washington and Tommy Leeks, with any grace.

Micah had stood immobile and red-in-the-face as Bryan and Tommy were ushered into the office for questioning. Of course, they denied everything and it became Micah’s word against theirs. And since Micah had never reported an incident of bullying before, even in his old elementary school were he’d had the misfortune of meeting Bryan’s fist in the third grade, it did not make sense to punish the boys without any proof.

Words unsaid, Micah was labeled a troublemaker. The other boys were given a stern ‘talking to’ about treating other people the way they wanted to be treated (just in case there was hint of truth to Micah’s words) and sent on their way.

The bullying had gotten worse after that. All Micah’s mother had managed to do was embarrass him in front of the entire school, cast him as a troublemaker and liar in the principal’s eye, and earn herself a place on Bryan and Tommy’s shit-list, firmly under Micah—who’d held the honored place as number one since the third grade.

Now when Bryan and Tommy hurled insults at his head they included ones like: ‘You’re mom’s a cheap ass skank’ and, ‘your mom gave me AND my dad head last night.’

So no.

He wouldn’t allow his mom to know that the bullying continued at school. He just kept his eye on the prize: graduation. And lived for the summers.

The summers and mom’s band. Without fail Micah got himself off to Studio Se7en at least three times a week during the bands practices. He liked being around all the guys his mother worked with. They were fun to be around, and in the case of Kane Golden, lead guitarist in the band Thrice Broken, big as hell, strong and confident; everything Micah wanted to grow up to be.

Micah couldn’t picture Kane being picked on. He imagined that Kane was a force to reckon with even when he was a boy. Where Kane was loud and boisterous, cocky and quick-tempered, Micah was quiet and shy, insecure and mild-mannered.

Even Ty Gunner, Thrice Broken’s keyboardist, who was about half Kane’s size didn’t seem like the type who got bullied. He was always the life of the party, making sure everyone laughed and had fun.

But where Micah’s admiration really rested was with Gabriel Stalling. He was the face of Thrice Broken, rapidly dragging his group to the top with his stellar vocals and exotic good looks. Micah’s mom said it was just a matter of time before Thrice Broken was a household name, thanks to their figurehead. Micah had to agree. Already people were starting to take notice when he was out with his mother. Thrice had opened up for a few big bands over the course of the summer and their album sells were steadily climbing.

Gabriel, who sometimes found himself painted in a negative light in the eyes of the media, took his defacement all in stride. Any news, including false news brought attention to the band. And having a bad boy reputation only made him more of a heartbreaker.

Sampson, Thrice Broken’s manager, was good at getting false public statements retracted and he plugged any monetary compensation from the unrepentant media right back into the band.

Micah found himself just as enamored with Gabriel as any screaming fan girl. He thought Gabriel was beautiful, and charming, and devilish. Micah thought that if God had ever created a perfect man he would have a combination of Kane’s size, Ty’s charisma and Gabriel’s good looks.

Of course, fast on the heels of this revelation, Micah grew concerned about his thoughts. He knew boys his age were supposed to start thinking about girls. Boys weren’t supposed to admire other boys or, in his case, other men in that way.

Micah worried that his thoughts about Thrice Broken’s band was more than admiration for how cool they were. He desperately wanted to ask someone about his feelings, but he had no friends to confide in and the thought of speaking to his mother about it scared him to death. His brother, Zachariah, would probably be just as disgusted as the bullies at St. Johns if he learned the truth.

In school, Bryan and Tommy already called him a faggot and on worse days—days when Micah ignored them until they grew angry enough to bring out ‘the big guns’ the bullies called him a cocksucker too. If they ever learned about his thoughts concerning Gabriel, Ty and Kane, he’d be as good as dead meat. They’d never let up on him—not that he could imagine his school life being any worse of a hell than it was now.

As he walked into the soundproof room, Micah tucked those troublesome thoughts away to be examined for another time. He still had six and a half days of summer left. Plastering a false smile on his face, Micah pretended to be the young man everyone thought he was. He pretended to be happy, and carefree, and just a twelve year old kid sitting in a soundproof room drinking sodapop.

Normal.

Cause nobody wanted a faggot for a son? Did they?

Scrapped start #2

Matt-Fucking-Ingram

“Broggie? Broger? Brogster?” Randall Hewitt cooed, batting his stubby, dark lashes at his little brother. “You gonna help move this couch or what?”

Brogan Hewitt looked up from a box of skin magazines he was perusing to curl his lip at his older brother. “Call me that again and I’ll pound you.”

“He can do it too,” Randall’s best friend and roommate, Matt Ingram, noted. “Your little brother is fuckin’ butch.”

Randall rolled his eyes. “Tell me about it. Lucky bastard.” Randall raised his hands in the air in a dramatic stretch and cracked his neck. “Come on Brogan, I’m about to perish from hunger already. Let’s get this stuff outta here, huh?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m coming.” Reluctantly, Brogan tossed the skin mag he was reading back in the box and replaced the cardboard cover. He walked over to the large, beige sofa Randall and Matt had been struggling with for the last five minutes and lifted one end effortlessly.

Randall and Matt groaned as they picked up the other end of the couch. The next five minutes were an exercise in patience as the three young men jostled and contorted the sofa a hundred different ways just to fit it out of the door and down the winding hall to the moving truck below where Brogan and Randall’s dad waited.

“That the last piece?” Randall Hewitt Senior asked, stepping aside so the young men could walk the couch up the ramp onto the back of the moving truck.

“Just a few more boxes, Dad,” Randall groaned.

After setting down the sofa their Dad took a look inside the trailer and declared, “Well, that’s all she can hold. You guys have room inside the Taurus for those boxes?”

“If we stuff somethings in the backseat we will,” Matt said.

“I’m going to head out then.” Mr. Hewitt nodded at his passenger seat. “One of you boys riding with me. Gotta get this stuff unloaded before the game starts.”

The boys looked around at each other. “Doesn’t matter to me,” Brogan said.

Matt shrugged.

Randall Jr. smiled. “Well, if I have too. I don’t mind going ahead with dad and making a stop at Ruby’s Burgerhouse on the way back to our new apartment, eh?”

Randall Sr. rolled his eyes at his son’s cheesy grin. “Come on you. I’ll get you some chili cheese fries before you perish. “

” Yes, win!”Randall Jr. crowed.

“Grow up!” Brogan said, with a shake of his head.

Randall climbed into the car, rolled down the window and poked his head out.“Seeyah later suckers.”

“You guys gonna be fine here on your own?” Mr. Hewitt asked.

“Yeah, Mr. Hewitt, we only have a few more boxes.” Cocking a thumb at Brogan who stood next to him, Matt said, “I’ll even feed the big lug for helping us out. It’s no problem.”

“Okay, then. See you later.”
Brogan stood beside Matt watching until the moving truck disappeared around a corner. Then with a smack of his hands he announced. “Let’s get to it.”
Back inside the apartment, Brogan started stacking boxes, intending to take three at a time.

Matt walked right past him into the kitchen. Brogan heard the refrigerator opening but paid it no mind until Matt returned with two cans of coke in hand. “Thought you guys had emptied the house of everything?” Brogan asked.

“We did. Randall was saving this for us in case we got thirsty. Might as well polish them off. You want one.”
“Yeah, sure.” Brogan cupped his hands and easily caught the can of coke that sailed through the air. When he made to open it, Matt started forward. “Hey, genius, that’s shaken--.”

“With a soft hissing sound Brogan slowly popped the tab before pulling it completely back and chugging a few swallows. The soda sizzled pleasantly as it went down. Flashing a grin at Matt, he said, “It’s all in the technique, kid.”

Matt flipped him off and sipped his own soda.

Brogan moved a few more boxes one-handed while he drank the rest of his coke. When he was done making a mini mountain he said. “I think that’s all of it.”

Matt leaned on the doorjamb at the entrance to the living room and stared at him while drinking his soda. “Yeah, guess so.”

Unnerved by the intense scrutiny of his brother’s best friend, Brogan tossed back the last sip and belched loudly, attempting to break the tense silence with his usual antics. Matt didn’t even crack a smile, which made the moment even more awkward until finally Brogan demanded, “What? Is there something on my face?”

Matt shook his head, but didn’t bother to answer the question. “I want to thank you for helping us out today man. We really appreciate it.”

Brogan’s heart beat started to return to a normal rhythm but now his gut was churning uneasily. What the fuck is up with Matt Ingram? If this was some joke, it wasn’t funny. Nervously, Brogan ran a hand through his short brown hair. “I was nothing. Come on. Let’s move these boxes to the car.” And get the hell out of here. Tossing his can in the trash bag swinging from the doorknob, Brogan bent down to pick up three boxes he had stacked. He was heading to the door with them when Matt spoke again.

“I’d like to repay you for helping us out.”
“Not necessary,” Brogan said quickly, not willing to turn around. Matt was one of the coolest guys he knew. This 180 he was pulling threw Brogan off balance.

“No. It is important. I have something I’ve been meaning to give you.” Brogan heard the other man moving in his direction. He froze where he was, every muscle tensed in his body.

The situation seemed surreal, from the first moment Matt laid his calloused hand on Brogan’s shoulder to the time he took the boxes out of Brogan’s grasp and sank to his knees.

What the fuck are you doing? This was not the Matt Ingram he knew. Matt didn’t fit the persona of a man anyone would call a fairy. Yet, he was down on his knees about to undo Brogan’s pants—not an easy feat with his dick straining at the zipper. A look of pure eagerness came over Matt’s face as he fished inside Brogan’s underwear with all the enthusiasm of a young man about to get just what he wanted on Christmas morning.

The air seemed to implode all around Brogans head, the moment Matt surrounded his cock with a wickedly tight grip and tugged him out. “Oh, yeah. I knew you were a big boy all over, stud.”
What the fuck!

Matt. Fucking. Ingram. Has his hand around my dick?

“Ahhh!” Was all Brogan managed to get out as Matt went to town, licking his cock from root to tip with the most talented tongue Brogan had ever experienced. Not that he had anything to compare it to. He’d yet to reach the age where he was bold enough to ask a girl for head. None of the girls he’d dated ever offered so he was usually forced to be content with vanilla sex. But this. This was bliss. This was toe-curling, fantasy inducing, drive-you-out-of-your-mind-ecstasy.

Obviously, this was not Matt’s first time. He seemed to know just where to press his tongue, when to let a gentle scrape of teeth set Brogan on fire, and most importantly, how to overcome his gag reflex to take Brogan’s eight inches to the hilt. “Fuck. Oh, shit. Stop. Stop.” Brogan warned, tangling his fingers in Matt’s shoulder length dark brown hair. “Stop or I’m going to come.”

“Mmhmm. Come for me, Brogan. Come in my mouth. I want to swallow your cum.” Matt teased his tongue across Brogan’s slit, and it was all Brogan could do to lock his knees so he wouldn’t fall down. “Every last drop,” Matt added.

Brogan did just that. He couldn’t hold it anymore. It was like trying to hold back the flow of volcanic lava with your hand. Impossible. Painful even to even try. As the first muscle convulsion hit, Matt slid his hands around to Brogan’s buttocks. Cupping the muscled cheeks, he pressed Brogan closer to his face and inhaled his scent as if he were trying to drown himself in Brogan’s body. He swallowed around each spurt of cum until Brogan was too drained to stand. Finally, when Brogan’s cock had given up its last, Matt allowed him to crumble to the floor. He pushed Brogan onto his back and straddled his waist.

Recovering from his earlier exertion, Brogan was in no condition to knock Matt away, let alone wonder what the man was doing. Matt pushed up his shirt and ran his hands over Brogan’s heaving abdomen. His eyes grew lidded with pleasure. “You gorgeous, motherfucker.”

Brogan’s cheeks flushed and he shut his eyes, blowing out a steady stream of air as he’d been taught to do during high-stress situations as a child. He used his breathing exercise now to calm his nerves. Though nothing could change the fact that he’d just been given the best and only, blowjob of his life, and it’d been by a guy.

Brogan’s cock jerked, and Matt wrapped his hand around the rallying appendage possessively. “Oh, yeah, the Mighty B.”

Brogan laughed hoarsely, but that laugh turned into a moan when Matt started peppering kisses and flicking his agile tongue at the crease where Brogan's thigh met torso.

Oh, shit.

Matt.

Fucking.

Ingram.

And his talented mouth had just ruined everything.

Tough

2011-06-17T14:39:00.006-04:00

“For a tree to become tall it must grow tough roots among the rocks.”

~Friedrich Nietzsche

If the internet was the Matrix, I'd have to admit to being disconnected for a long, long time now. Oh, I've logged online, lurked at my usual haunts. I read some. I type a little, but my former progress--the fire that had been crackling in my belly at the end of last year--went out.

No one is immune to change. To difficulties and struggles. I feel like that has been hammered home this year for me. This has been a very, very difficult few months. I won't get into long drawn out details and throw myself a pity party. I just thought I owed it to the loyal reader who drops by my site month after month and gets disappointed by my lack of releases, to know what is going on.

I'll tell you that there are three people I love more than anyone in the world. My Mom (single parent). My sister. And my Grandmother. Two out of three of those threatened to leave my side. My grandmother, who has fought valiantly against that wretched monster known as cancer for over twenty years (on again and off again) may very well have to fight again. Except now she is 73, and frankly, in her words "Too Damned Tired." Just a moment ago I got off the phone with her. I asked her how her leg was and if the doctors had any news. She doesn't know yet if it's the cancer causing the swelling and pain. I pray to God it's benign.

My life was effectively derailed by a suicide attempt.I was clouted right in the left side of the temporal lobe by a bus I never saw coming. My sister attempted to commit suicide by swallowing over six kinds of medication. I work as a case manager for the mentally ill and so does my mother. To see my sister in a place where I've taken my patients was a shock to the heart and nervous system. To say the least, I bawled like a baby.

I marched up a hill for a little over a week to visit my big sis in a psychiatric unit for the grand allotted time of an hour. This reminded me of the prison visits I took as a little girl to visit my father. Sign in. Sign out. No use of last names to identify the client. Thick wooden and metal doors that don't open unless the first one has closed. And you can't bring the patient/prisoner anything that hasn't been checked by the staff first. It was sort of surreal to see the nurse holding up my sister's bra as she checked it for wires.

My sister is home now, spending three days a week at my house and four days with her boyfriend (our attempt to insure she is never alone). She's not fine by any means of course. Luckily, she's been set up with a psychiatrist and Outpatient Group Therapy.

My mother and I sat around for an hour (one of many days and months) discussing her behavioral patterns. My mom has a gut instinct for such things as mental illness with over twenty years experience in the field. The manic and depressed moods. Along with a dozen previously baffling habits strongly suggest my sister is bipolar. I'd been saying something was wrong with my big sister for years. 1+2=3 was not exactly adding up. My mom had always denied such things. She didn't want to 'believe' that this could happen with her daughter but now she is starting to see the light. Unfortunately I can see the light too and I know it's rusting my mom's cast-iron spirit.

There have been about three other major incidents and revelations that occurred in my life in the last few months which I won't even get into. What I have written has helped immensely. Written words have always come much easier to me than talking. I think writing is so important to me, integral to my existence, because it unburdens my soul.

I think I'm ready to face the stories once more. I'll blow of the light layer of dust and fall in love with my characters again. That's one thing I can control. The rest is up to God and time.

Read 'em and Weep

2010-11-28T16:31:00.009-05:00

It occurred to me while devouring loads of m/m goodiness that I had certain types of characters I found highly attractive, and even if the story was mediocre in plot, I still loved it to smithereens just because a certain character was in it. I decided to share my favorite pairings here.

1. Pushy Bottom/ Pushover Top

There is a delicate balance in this pairing, as the PB could come off as whiny and annoying if all goes horribly wrong. Thus, he must have qualities that make him irresistible, such as a wicked sense of humor, a pinch of sarcasm, AND he must be sex on two legs or at least close to it.(which does not mean he is drop-dead gorgeous) A PB has to make the reader cheer in his corner for him to get his man.

On the flip side, I like nothing better than a Pushover Top. He won't be a PT in all aspects of life and their relationship. 9/10 he'll be physically imposing, strong, capable and intelligent. Where the PT comes in is that he just can't say no to the PB, especially where the bedroom is concerned. I like it when PT plays hard to get--when Mr. Tough Guy Kick ASS hesitates in falling into bed with PB, but really can't say no to his advances. While PT fights to keep his breeches on he honestly 'wants' the same thing that PB does. (Or else he'd turn into Hulk and kiss his ass, no?) Right.

2. Even Stevens

I grew tired of the helpless smaller (pale, androgynous, slim as a reed, full pink lips, long lashed, delicate) male about two years ago. Usually he was paired up with a big bruiser that called all the shots and saved his ass six ways 'til Sunday. I understand that men come in all shapes and sizes and fear/courage levels, but come on! This ain't your grandmother's romance of 1972. I didn't like it when I read it in het romance and I don't like it now. I can get with this story on the rare (very rare) occasion, but of late I am all for the same-build/same-playing-field kind of guy.

I don't care if one is predominantly a top or bottom. I don't care if they play reversy until their eyes fall out and they injure a hip. I just like to know that each is equally capable of taking care of himself. I like the fact that they can 'play wrestle' and you don't know who will be the victor. And when one of them consents to be the bottom, well hell, that is just hot to have a big man secure enough to be the catcher.

3. Billy Badass/Billy Tamer

I like flaws. No one is perfect, so personality flaws are a-okay with me. Again, there is a delicate balance between being an asshat and being assertive. I like a guy who is kind of cocky, self-assured, maybe even selfish. (of course he evolves during the story)No way I want him to be the same way in the end. Can't have a happily ever after if BB still cares more for his reflection in the mirror than the other guy.

Now, introduce BB to BT. This guy is badass in a totally different way. If BB thought he was cool, he hasn't seen nothing yet. If BB thought he was the top to tame all tops...oh boy...he better eat his Wheaties because BT is here to shake things up.

BB might think he's alpha dog, but he's about to learn his place as omega and he is going to LIKE it. It's important that when Mr. BB gets tamed he's never broken. He can still be somewhat cocky and selfish, but he has learned that there are more important things in life than his own pleasure, like his BT's.

If you have any favorite pairing ideas not mentioned here feel free to share.

Favorites of July 2010

2010-07-31T20:59:00.003-04:00

Favorites of June 2010

2010-06-25T14:18:00.004-04:00

Books
1.Reasonable Doubt by Mia Watts
2.Taboo by Willa Okati
3.Security Issues by Morgan Hawke
4.Mind F*cked by Mia Watts

Movies
1.Teenage Witch
2.Stepfather
3.Orphan
4.Shrek 3: Happily Ever After

TV
1.First 48
2.Oprah
3.Hoarders
4.Gangland

Music
1.One Last Breath performed by Creed
2.When I'm Gone performed by Three Doors Down
3.Moving Mountains performed by Thrice
4.Malaguena Salerosa performed by Chingon

Favorites of May 2010

2010-05-31T23:15:00.004-04:00

Books
1. The Vast Fields of Ordinary by Nick Burd
2. Hood by Noire
3.Mississippi Sissy by Kevin Sessums
4.My Sister's Keeper by Maragaret Moorman

Movies
1.Descent 2
2.Iron Man 2
3.Tremors
4.The Hangover

Music
1.Drops of Jupiter performed by Train
2.Wake Me Up Inside performed by Evanescence
3.Young Forever performed by Mr.Hudson and Jay Z
4.Keep Me performed by The Black Keys

TV
1.Hoarders
2.Intervention
3.First 48
4.I Almost Got Away With It

Favorites of April 2010

2010-04-23T21:33:00.009-04:00

Books
1.Hayashi's Hero by Marie Harte
2.Velvet Need by Sean Michael
3.Out of my Mind by M.L. Rhodes
4.She's Got Balls by Mia Watts

Movies
1.Aliens
2.Ghost Busters
3.Sorority Boys
4.Doubt

Music
1. Down With the Sickness performed by Disturbed
2.Looking Boy performed by Yung Joc and crew
3.The Way I feel performed by Paul Oakenfold
4.I Have a Song performed by Eric Roberson

TV
1.Intervention
2.Hoarders
3.The First 48
4.Sanford and Son

Favorites of March 2010

2010-03-21T20:31:00.004-04:00

Books
1.Flight by Nicki Burnett
2.Hide and Seek by Ike Reibun(yaoi manga)
3.Stepping Stone by Kano Shiuko (yaoi manga)
4.Rabbit Man, Tiger Man (yaoi manga)

Movies
1.Ninja Assassin
2.Coraline
3.Monster House
4.Sherlock Holmes

TV
1.Hoarders
2.Intervention
3.1,000 Ways to Die
4.Mighty B

Music
1.Bulletproof performed by Raheem
2.Momma Told Me Not to Come performed by Three Dog Night
3.Sleep performed by One Republic
4.How to Save A Life performed by The Fray

Favorites of February 2010

2010-03-06T10:35:00.005-05:00

Books
1. Double Bound by Nick Nolan
2. Hey Doctor(yaoi manga) by Uchida Kaoru
3. King and Prince(yaoi manga) Kujisaki Kou
4. Broken Boundaries by Evangeline Anderson

Movies
1. Ninja Assassin
2. Avatar
3. Sherlock Holmes
4. The Glass House

Music
1. Hallelujah performed by Jeff Buckley
2. Have You Ever Seen the Rain performed by Creedance Clearwater
3. Fix You performed by Coldplay
4. Crazy performed by Gnarls Barkley

TV
1. 1,000 Ways to Die
2. Sanford and Sons
3. First 48
4. Cold Case Files

Plans for 2010

2010-01-28T05:38:00.005-05:00

I'm fully loaded. Yes, I have WIPS going every which a way right now. I'm writing about werewolves(have been for some time actually)spacemen, aliens, incubi, martial artists, and models. I have contemporary settings, fantasy, SciFi, and paranormal. I'd like 2010 to be my biggest release year for e-books, so when I finally do have a release I want them to trickle down like dominoes. You can expect releases from different publishing houses as I intend to spread them out, and I'm going to get a contract with Loose Id if it kills me. Haven't tried just yet so please keep your fingers crossed because they are my next aim.

I do have a release on the horizon however, and trust me it will be done because my deadline is the beginning of February.I won't share details just yet because I'm not sure what could change in the next two and a half weeks or so.

In other news, those looking out for Brogan and Micah's story, know that it will come. I have written on them already but the idea stalled out and now I am waiting for them to talk again while scratching out ideas in a notebook for their story. I want it to be in depth so that when you finish the book you feel like you know them--strengths, weaknesses and all.

I have plans for a few series and a story in the G-Strain universe.(You can find out more by visiting the WIPS page on my website.)

Favorites of January 2010

2010-01-28T05:26:00.004-05:00

Books
1.Strings Attached by Nick Nolan
2.And Call Me in the Morning by Willa Okati
3.Two In, Two Out by G.A. Hauser
4.Golden Boy by Claire Thompson

Movies
1.Avatar
2.The Princess and the Frog
3.Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead
4.28 Days Later

TV
1.Intervention
2.Hoarders
3.Oprah
4.The first 48

Music
1.Blind performed by Lifehouse
2.Hallelujah performed by Jeff Buckley
3.Chances performed by Five for Fighting
4.Give me Some Love performed by James Blunt

Believe It or Not

2009-12-11T14:18:00.016-05:00

Have you ever read a book that made you read a sentence over and over and over and over again because you just can't believe that you just read what you just read?! I never have, until today. Well actually, I cracked open this file last night and started to read, but I was too tired to continue. So today I started anew. And let me just tell you, before I jump into my rant, that I haven't even finished the story yet. I'm not far off, but I have fear and 'hope' for the ending.

You can find this ebook, Alive On the Inside, at Amber Quill Press. I was written by Naomi Brooks and Angelia Sparrow. I've read their works before and enjoyed them, plus, I'm not squeamish, and I can go for some unconventional lovemaking/characters. HOWEVER, *big sigh*, I don't think the warning adequately covers what you can expect in this story. Below I've included the warning.

This book contains graphic violence, hardcore bondage and punishment, torture and blood play. May not be suitable for the more sensitive reader. (I also think this warning won't adequately convey what to expect because it has been used so frivolously in novels that don't even come near the level of violence and graphic detail of this novel.I've written bloody scenes myself, decapitation, implosion, explosions, and maiming. However, I don't think all that effects us when it happens in battle-scenes or as punishment. Battle we can understand. Punishment we can undestand, but pain at this level for the sake of pleasure? Well, that's just downright disturbing, eh?)

I'll leave that up to you daring readers to decide.

What they don't tell you are that there are some heavy religious issues faced in this story. As a matter of fact, a large portion of the story focuses on faith, belief in God, damnation, sodomy and the like. I think they should have included that in the warning as well. Anyhow, the story is quite unique. The writing is exceptional. The idea original. The execution's what horrified me. The main characters work for the Phantasmagoria: a circus that moves from town to town using the railroads to travel. The Phantasmagoria has been around, as the books says, forever, in one form or another. Its highly paranormal; the entire act is run on magic and mystery, fueled by the blood of the innocent and the souls of the guileless. But the guiltless murdering of innocent people isn't what horrified me either. After all, I am a huge horror fan, and I expected some sophisticated explanation of it all and in the end a redemption of some sort.

What GOT ME was the show itself. Of course I've seen movies about freaks and read up on all manner of disturbing scenarios but surely some of the horrifying acts, described in gory detail made even me--who does not have a penis-- shrivel up and die. I mean if I had a penis I would baby it for like three months after reading this. I would check every hour of the day to make sure it was still there. The acts performed by the characters during their performance made me a little queasy sometimes. If you have an imagination anything like mine and you decide to read this book, then perhaps you will know something of what I speak.

SPOILERS AHEAD! YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.

Expect everything you've seen in movies about freakshows/circuses like bearded women, Siamese twins, wicked clowns and deformed dwarves--freaks as they call them. Also expect these freaks to have sex, and expect a front-row seat. Expect dildos with spikes,cutting as entertainment, some character abuse.

As for the horror, one example that comes to mind is when Torturo, The Pain King, and MC of Alive on the Inside roasted his penis in a fire, stuck a fork in it, and tricked a man to bite into it to see that it was real. It was, and the guy bit the tip off. I almost died. I really did. The guy BIT OFF roasted penis.

Well, I don't want to offer up anymore spoilers. There are plenty more delights in the story. I'm off to finish reading this baby! I tip my hat to the two authors. They have balls--balls the size of basketballs. I hardly ever feel the compulsion to dissect a read, to share, or spoil any details of its offering, but I must say this one touched me deeply in a place I won't soon forget.

The Saddest Smile I've Ever Seen

2009-12-08T03:57:00.004-05:00

Today I stumbled across some old poetry I wrote back in 2007 while I was in college. I went through a period of deep depression while being separated from my folks for the first time, and I really was not enjoying the campus life. Writing poetry, which is something I rarely do, provided both an outlet for my frustration and relief from boredom. While poetry is far from my strongest point, this poem in particular really resonated with me and still does.

You possess the saddest smile I've ever seen.
Must have been through many a things.
Your eyes are so sad, makes a person wonder if you were ever glad.
Must have been something you lost, you thought you had.

You possess the saddest smile I've ever seen.
Your tears could make the angels sing.
Broke your body right down to the spleen,
Invisible blood? What do you mean?

You possess the saddest smile I've ever seen,
Don't think you appreciate anything.
How long its been since you saw the color green?
Laid down in a bed of flowers in the spring?
Colored a flower blue and green?
Dropped a coin in a wishing well?
Tilted your head back in the rain and yelled?
Bought an apple pie just because of the smell?

You possess the saddest smile I've ever seen,
Must have been through many a things,
Your eyes are so sad, makes a person wonder if you were ever glad,
must have been something you lost, you thought you had.

Favorites of December 2009

2009-12-07T14:18:00.004-05:00

Books

1.Wanting by M.L. Rhodes
2.Unnecessary Roughness by G.A. Hauser
3.Wings by J.C. Owens
4.Just For You by Jet Mykles

Movies
1.No Country for Old Men
2.The Fifth Element
3.Blade Trinity
4.Ninja Assassin

TV
1.Baby Story
2.Cake Boss
3.I'm Alive
4.The Mighty B

Music
1.How to Save a Life performed by The Fray
2.You Know I'm no Good performed by Amy Winehouse
3.Con Te Partiro performed by Andrea Bocelli
4.Red Sky performed by Thrice

Virgin or not to virgin?

2009-12-05T18:35:00.005-05:00

[FYI: I'm talking about gay fiction here, at first.:D]

Well, this subject has been on my mind for some time, ever since I noticed my tendency to hit the back arrow on stories where characters are prostitutes. I'm not really a fan of prostitute stories, and I don't get its popularity (Though I have read a few). I can't really recall a trend in heterosexual romance where females were prostitutes and I'm quite sure if they were I'd gloss over them as well. I have indulged in stories with these types of characters by Ally Blue and Amanda Young, but that was because something really interested me in the storyline and I knew from the start that they were awesome authors.

So, does it matter that much: a person's sexual experience? I'd like to say no, but I am a guilty fangirl of the first timers. I could say its influenced by my own lifestyle, and maybe it is. Maybe ten years from now when(hopefully)I'm married I'll have a different perspective. Perhaps I am the victim of nearly ten years of historical romance where the damsel had to be pure as the newly fallen snow.

I think I enjoy the first time situation because I'm a hopeless romantic. Lets face it, more folks probably end up with a life partner after trial and error and hardly settle down with the man or woman who takes their virginity. But would they ever forget their first time? Even if that person was a jerk and the first time really sucked you'll probably still remember that person forever and ever. So the ultimate romance would be sticking with your first true love, right..or er..sex partner long enough for love to blossom?

Okay, maybe not.

Funnily enough, when a man has sex with women all his life and then sleeps with a man I still count him as a virgin. He's a virgin to gay sex and I still 'oh' and 'awe' at the first coming together.

In recent years, more so in heterosexual fiction, women are breaking out of their constrained roles as virgins while their male counterparts were sex gurus. I am happy about this and every now and then I'll pick up a m/f book regardless of either character's sexual experience. Though, nowadays, I read considerably far less m/f in romance then I do gay fiction.

If we authors are holding true to reality then we'd probably be able to say we know far more female virgins than male virgins (adult). Frankly, I don't know a single adult male virgin, unless somebody has been lying to me. In a world where exposure to sex is happening at far younger ages; teen pregnancy, and even contraction of STDS and fatal viruses are on the rise in some areas, keeping a boy or girl 'untried' until marriage is becoming but a glimmer on the horizon.

It never ceases to annoy me when folks arm themselves with religion to denounce gay rights because the bible 'says' it is a sin and yet no one ever talks about chastity to their children and how it is a sin to have sex out of wedlock. According to the bible their is no differentiation in sin. A murderer is just is guilty as a purse thief, but I digress.

Virgin or not to virgin? Surely we don't want to read hordes of bashful virgin men with horrible bedroom skills? Variety is the spice of life, yes? However, its called it fiction for a reason, and although some may grumble and huff--as they did when a certain --ebook that shall not be named released from Samhain--came out featuring a guy who had saved his virginity until he had a commitment from his partner, fiction is the only place where it is okay to be damn near perfect. Sure it may not be realistic for handsome twenty-three year old John to never have laid down with man when he's gay, but damn it, if nobody has written about a 220lb, five foot six inch man with a receding hairline in romance/erotica yet getting his happy ending, then I say let the fantasy be a fantasy. And give me my damn first-timer. :P

Now, having said all that I'd like to make it clear that I do not refuse to buy gay fiction books based on a character's sexual experience. Most of the ebooks I buy, you can't tell what is what until you start reading. I just think the V is an extra bonus, at least it is to me.

New website is up!

2009-12-04T08:36:00.003-05:00

Finally, my domain transfer kicked in yesterday so I am back in action. Sorry if you tried to visit my website and got the 'This account has been suspended message'. All is well now. I've subscribed to webs.com, which is 10x easier to handle than c-panel on host sites. I will miss my cowboys though, but I will be having a more professional layout done soon. You can still find me at sagewhistler.net

Website is temporarily down!

2009-12-01T23:20:00.005-05:00

If you've made it over to this blog you might have just come from my website which is down at the moment. Yes, I know it is no longer online and yes, I let it go on purpose. I am currently in the process of finding a new website provider and redecorating my website. Both should be accomplished within a week. Meanwhile, if anyone would like to get into contact with me you can reach me at sagewhistler@gmail.com.

Thanks for your patience, folks.

Yaoi and Me

2009-11-29T09:25:00.012-05:00

I'm the new kid on the block when it comes to reading Yaoi. I can't really recall what made me start reading it a second time. The first time I read yaoi was about a year and a half ago, and my attempt was not successful. As a matter of fact I purchased the manga and was so disappointed I contemplated heading back to the bookstore to get my money back. (A thing I have never done before, and didn't end up doing then). So the yaoi manga got tucked in amongst Stephen King's and Laurell K Hamiliton's collections. I dusted off my hands and called it a bust. Yaoi manga wasn't for me. The manga I had chosen was so sweet it gave me a headache and the sex did not deliver. IMHO. I'm all ruined from writing erotica, so I like my stuff explicit.

Anyway, only about three weeks ago I decided to try it again. I can't recall what made me start reading. I just know I ran across this fantastic site with a promising storyline and I started reading my eyes out. Scantalations made it possible for me to devour yaoi to my hearts content. I made sure to purchase some of my favorite reads if they were available on Amazon because I feel it's important to support your favorite artists.

I've learned quite a lot about Japanese culture while reading yaoi manga. Terms like bishie, uke, seme; distinguishing honorifics for your elders, superiors, strangers, and family members. I've picked up a few Japanese words along the way, and thanks to the way mangas are drawn I've developed the habit of reading from left to right, even when I'm not reading manga.

Now, if you have never read yaoi or adult manga(non-yaoi manga), period, you should know two things straight off the bat. You have to be able to get past the fact that some of these ukes and semes will not be 18yrs or older, and even those who are professed twenty-somethings still sometimes look like kids. It is the nature of the genre.I believe that you are not considered an adult in Japan until you are twenty, so even if the main characters are eighteen, technically, in Japan, they are still teenagers.

Secondly, if the idea of noncon and dubious consent squicks you out than yaoi probably is not for you. Now, that is not to say yaoi readers support noncon and dc, but we have the ability to see it as the fiction (in some people's case, the fantasy) that it is. It helps that these are drawings and not real folks.

Well, if you can accept those two (society taboos) then I think you can get down to the business of enjoying yaoi, like I did.

Fair warning: It is highly addictive, and may be the cause of a delinquent muse. :p

Favorites of November 2009

2009-11-29T08:46:00.004-05:00

Books
Yaoi Time:
1. Heart Strings by Akira Norikazu (manga)
2. Under Grand Hotel by Sadahairo Mika (manga)
3. Sleeping With Money by Barbara Katagiri (yaoi novel)
4.Temptation Recipe by Narazaki Souta (manga)

Movies
1. Precious
2. Australia
3.From Dusk Til Dawn
4. Bride Wars

TV
1. Martin
2. Iron Man
3. Mystery Diagnosis
4. Snapped

Music
1.Dare You to Move performed by Switchfoot
2.Morning has Broken performed by Cat Stevens
3.Ava Maria performed by Pavarotti
4.Swing Low performed by Rocco Deluca and The Burden

Favorites of October 2009

2009-10-18T20:02:00.004-04:00

Books
1. Going Deep by G.A. Hauser
2. The Way of Shadows by Brent Weeks
3. Shadow's Edge by Brent Weeks
4. Handyman by Claire Thompson (again)

TV
1.Snapped
2.Wildest Police Videos
3.Women of Broward County
4.I'm Alive

Movie
1.Lakeview Terrace
2.White Oleander
3.Pan's Labyrinth
4.From Dust Til Dawn

Music
1.Stuttering performed by Ben's Brother
2.Ricki Don't Lose That Number performed by Steely Dan
3.This is Halloween performed by Marilyn Manson
4.Lilac Wine performed by Jeff Buckley

The Little Engine That Couldn't

2009-10-14T23:24:00.005-04:00

After a long hard debate, a miraculous effort on my part to be patient and understanding, I have come to the end of my rope and will be silent no longer about the train wreck that is Cacoethes Publishing.

First, let me say I have all the respect in the world for the bold upstarters of ebook companies. It takes a lot of courage, hard work, dedication, and insight into the publishing market and its readers. There are a lot of fly-by-night companies that have to close their door almost as soon as they open. Dreaming is nice, but you have to have a plan. Cacoethes was built on sandcastles and fluffy clouds. It was too hollow to hold up under the pressure and now the CEO won't even own up to the dream that turned into a nightmare.

I say it is a nightmare because what else could you call such unprofessional behavior? In the following list I will break down the things that have gone on in this company since signing my contract.

1. The first sign I naively ignored was bad editors. Back in 2007 they hired a woman who helped me edit my first book Torn. If anyone has ever read Torn they may find it an enjoyable read, but it is littered with grammar and continuity issues that should have been caught in the editing process. I even had to go back and have books pulled off the virtual shelves to have more editing done. What you are seeing is 'actually' vastly improved.

2. Firing and Hiring. The CEO, Denise Mosely, has gone through at least four personal assistants, who knows how many editors,two bookeepers(as far as I know) and even about three web masters.I have had a different editor--fresh off the hiring block--for all four of my releases with them.

3. Late issues. Cacoethes has never been on time with book releases, sales reports, or payments. As a matter of fact they owe me about four or five checks if not more right now. Cac has also been late in delivering orders on paperbacks for customers and authors who had book signings. I never would do a book signing as a author for them for this very reason.

4. Hidden Fees. Cacoethes released a notice to all their authors almost a year after they opened their doors to tell us about these new fees that would come out of our paychecks.(Our nonexistent paychecks)

5. Site upkeep. Take a look for yourself at the poorly organized site(The banner at the top is a St. Patrick's banner.They used it in March, but now they just turned it gray and white and posted it again.) There used to be author bios but I don't know what happened to them. There used to be a guest book but the customers and authors posted so many complaints on it that they had it removed.

6. Cac used to have a (virtual) magazine called Lotic back in 2007 and early 2008 but the magazine only had about four issues. I suspect it was too costly for them to keep up. I won't begrudge them the fact that the few issues they released were pretty nicely done, if as poorly edited as their books, but having a outdated magazine on their site about six months after its release did not make us look professional at all.

7. No customer service. I cannot tell you how many customers emailed me about not being able to get in touch with anyone when they did not receive their orders or they could not navigate the site well. I usually pointed them in the All Romance Ebooks direction--who also distribute my ebooks.

8. Inconsistency. At first Cac had a model for book prices according to their length which they NEVER stuck by. However, the prices have become more outrageous--jacked up by fifty cents to a dollar or lowered by the same degree. There is no ryhme or reason for what they are doing. They notify no one about their changes.

With all this said I ask that any readers of my books do not hand another dollar to this company. I cannot ask for other authors because I don't know if they are getting paid. I'M NOT GETTING PAID! Cacoethes has a sale going on for $2 right now on EVERY book, no matter how long or short. Folks are calling it a firesale and maybe it is, but I urge you to not pay them a single dime of your hardearned money. I do not begrudge you readers who have already purchased my books any of your enjoyment. I thank you for your support and appreciate every one of you. You can expect to see me under honest and reputable publishers from now on. I'm over at Total-E-Bound if you need to find me.

Me and Cac are through.

You can also find out more about how bad it is over a Cac on Writer's Beware.

Winners

2009-09-15T22:37:00.002-04:00

The Winners of the Be Honest Contest are Jan S., Pia Veleno, and Nemine Gavran! Congratulations to all!

Be Honest Contest

2009-09-12T07:12:00.005-04:00

Sage is taking an unofficial poll of what readers want to, well…read.
In order to be placed in the drawing for a free pdf copy of Broken, Sage asks that participants email her their top three favorite features in a story.
Examples of what she means are as follows:

~Gay for you storylines
~Best friends becoming more
~Shapeshifting/action stories
~Alpha hero coupled with a submissive hero
~Angst—obstacle-ridden stories

(Feel free to provide ideas not listed here. You are not restricted to my examples.)

NOTE: Please email all THREE answers in the body of your email to whistlercon at yahoo. com . That is whistlercon@yahoo.com.
Do not send answers to sagewhistler@gmail.com. All answers appearing in that inbox will not be entered into the drawing. Also, please do not send answers via Sage’s website contact page. Again, all answers sent in this way will not be entered into the drawing.

Winners will be announced (and personally contacted) September 15th. There will be a drawing of three.

Please, also include your first name or nickname and last initial in your email, as long as you agree to have it announced on the contest page in the event that you are one of the winners.

Contest deadline: 12:00pm September 15th Eastern,US time.

Excerpt From Broken

2009-09-04T23:41:00.004-04:00

Coming September 14th to Total-E-Bound!

Warning: This story features intimacy between twins and gay sexual practices. It is not suitable for persons under 18 years of age, or those who might be easily offended.

Tristan was sitting at the bar shelling peanuts when Gabriel slipped onto the stool next to him.

“Howdy, pardner,” Gabriel rumbled in his ear, reaching over to snag Tristan’s beer. He took a sip. “Enjoying the night life?”

Obviously tipsy, Tristan giggled. “It’s past my bedtime.”

“You ready to go home?”

“Nope. Red head.” He held his hands out well past his chest. “Big boobs. Be back in th-thirty hours.”

Gabriel chuckled, pretty sure his brother was too damn drunk to know the difference between thirty minutes and thirty hours.

He tugged Tristan’s arm. “Come on. We’ll wait for her in my car.” And while they were at it, he’d get Tristan home and tucked into bed.

“’Kay.” Tristan waved sloppily at the bartender. “Bye, Keif.”

Keith smiled fondly and waved back. “Take care, Tristan.” He nodded at Gabriel. “Brogan driving?”

“Yeah.” He’d had only two and a half beers, but he wasn’t taking any chances, especially if he didn’t have to. Brogan was waiting outside with his jeep to take them both home. Luckily, the crowd in Orion knew to be on their best behaviour. Any confrontation with the members of Thrice Broken was an automatic ejection and revoking of club rights. He went pretty much unmolested in his own place.

Wrapping Tristan’s arm around his neck and his arm around his twin’s waist, Gabriel supported his brother’s weight as they moved through the crowd. Tristan wasn’t fall down drunk. In fact except for a stumble or two, he walked under his own power. It was just easier to get them both to the same destination at the same time. Or so Gabriel told himself as he traded the body-heated club air for the cool, fresh air outside.

Brogan didn’t get out to open the door. The fucker. Gabriel smiled to himself, not even bothering to ask. He knew what Brogan would say. “I’m not a fucking chauffeur, boss.” True. He’d fired D’angelo three months ago and had never gotten around to hiring a new one.

Gabriel got Tristan into the jeep with little trouble. It was when they were both seated that the problem arose. Either Tristan thought he was with the buxom red-head or he imagined Gabriel could be his pillow because he cuddled right up to his brother, squeezing his waist and burying his face in the side of Gabriel’s neck. Tristan huffed then sighed, settling down.

Gabriel’s heartbeat picked up an anxious rhythm. Tristan was too close for comfort and parts of him were starting to take notice.

Brogan glanced up at the rear-view mirror. “You okay, Gabe?”

“Huh? Yeah, fine,” Gabriel said, praying it was too dark in the interior for Brogan to see how ‘not fine’ he really was with Tristan curled around him. He debated whether to try and pry off Tristan and, finally, decided that at least removing his arm would be a good idea.

No sooner had he wrapped his hand around Tristan’s wrist than his brother became animated—well, at least, his lips did. “Red head. Big Boobs. She reminded me of Bekah. Hmm…bitch.”

Brogan snorted with laughter in the front seat.

Gabriel ignored him. Curious, he asked, “Who is Bekah?”

“Ex. She left me after I lost my beer.”

More laughter from Brogan.

Gabriel tried to slap Brogan in the back of the head, but his arm wouldn’t reach unless he shifted Tristan. Idiot.

“You mean money,” Gabriel corrected.

“Erm…no…mag-ma-ga-zeen. Playgirl. Lost it, and she found it.”

His heart skipped a beat in his chest. Inadvertently, his fingers dug into Tristan’s shoulder until his brother made a distressed sound. “Sorry. Listen to me, Tristan. Was it Playgirl or Playboy?” He asked the question as if his life depended on it. It probably did.

Tristan huffed against his neck. “Playgirl. No gays for Bekah.”

“Holy shit!” Brogan said from the front seat.

Holy shit was right.

Favorites of September 2009

2009-09-02T21:42:00.002-04:00

Books
1. Creation's Control by Marie Harte
2.Tempestuous by Morgan Hawke
3. Blood Noir by Laurell K. Hamilton
4. Wedding Planner by G.A. Hauser

Movies
1. Last House on the Left
2. Inglourious Basterds
3. Sunshine Cleaning
4. Obessession

Music
1. I Put a Spell On You performed by Nina Simone
2. Naive performed by The Kooks
3. Daughters performed by John Mayer
4. Gravity performed by John Mayer

TV
1. Meerkat Manner
2. Big Cat Diaries
3. America's Best Dance Crew (ABDC)
4. Police Women of Broward County

Favorites of August 2009

2009-08-04T22:34:00.003-04:00

Movies
1. Caroline
2.The Soloist
3. No Country For Old Men
4. Inglourious Basterds (I'm foreshadowing)

Books
1. Vernon Can Read by Vernon Jordan
2. Blaze by Stephen King
3. Hemovore by Jordan Castillo Price
4. Obedience Training by Mya

Music
1. It's Not My Time performed by Three Doors Down
2. Mad World performed by Michael Andrews
3. Naive performed by the Kooks
4. The Stroke performed by Billy Squire

TV
1. Operation Repo
2. Wildest Police Chases
3. Big Cat Diaries
4. It's Me or the Dog

At Last...

2009-07-25T21:37:00.003-04:00

What? I know my background is a little retro hippie, but I'm not inclined to change it at the moment. It took me like two hours to find out how to make three columns in blogger and in the end I ended up copying and pasting a template so that's sort of cheating. O_O Anyway, I hope the yellow does not make your eyes bleed. I will be checking out different templates in the near future. In the meantime it might help to squint. Lol JK.

Peace!

July Favorites 2009

2009-07-13T05:02:00.003-04:00

Books

1. Str8te Boys by Evangeline Anderson
2. The Gold Warrior by Clare London
3. The Twisted Brand by Clare London
4. Found by Sean Micheal

Movies

1. Valkyrie
2. Transformers: Rise of the Fallen
3. I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry
4. Eagle Eye

Music

1. Sleep-One Republic
2. Iko Iko-The Dixie Cups
3. They Won't Go When I Go-Stevie Wonder
4. Blowin' in the Wind-Stevie Wonder

TV
1. Monsters Inside Me
2. Mystery Diagnosis
3. Big Cat Diaries
4. Outrageous Moments Caught on Tape

Finishing what I started...

2009-07-01T02:02:00.003-04:00

Is terribly hard for me to do. Why? Lazy. Distracted. Flighty. Bored. I could write a list a mile long on why I find it hard to end stories. I'm not like this on anything else. Reading books I almost always finish, chores, jobs, projects, tasks. I finish what I start, but when I sit down to write a story for some reason I find it immensely hard to keep myself interested beyond two weeks. Oh, I'll keep coming back to the story, adding stuff on here and there. It might take me weeks, it might take me months...hell, it might take me years. Sometimes I question why I call myself an author. Like all authors, we are our own worse critics and I question myself. Am I good enough? Am I improving? Was the story I just put out a waste of time, both mine and the readers? Yes. Yes. And No--I'd like to think. I try and squash self-doubt, and I've tried several techniques to become motivated in a story I started. I think my biggest problem in this area is discipline. Quite frankly, I need more of it. My beta friend calls her sessions of writing grinding. I've tried to take a page out of her book and grind, and then I wrote myself into a corner.

I used the terms Muse and writer's block, but one author wrote in his interview that he doesn't believe in muses and that writer's block is just an excuse. I disagree with the first, on the basis that its just a term given to the creative 'spirit' if you will, inside us all. On the second, I have to agree. There probably is no such thing as writer's block. You can write at any time, but is it any good?

My reluctance to write sometimes comes from the fact that I'm a pantser. I have a total of one book planned out--each chapter, step by step, from beginning to end--and I grew bored with it and shelved it before I got to the halfway point. I'm not sure how writing works. I couldn't explain how I go from page three to ninety-three. I can't explain how I even know what my character will say next. It just...flows. It just springs to my mind and my fingers translate. Sometimes nothing springs to my mind, or on second thought I don't like what I've written and I need to take a step back to figure out how to get from point A to point B.

Sometimes I just lose interest. 95% of the time its because some idea has sprung to my mind and I think its better. I'm slowly learning to write out of sequence. By that I mean write scenes as they come to me. I couldn't tell you how many stories have stumped me with what happens next because I couldn't climb over a mole hill I'd made for myself. I used to have to write in order. After Cory wakes up he 'had' to eat breakfast before he went to the gym. If I didn't feel like writing the breakfast scene I couldn't get on with the gym scene. If I didn't feel like tackling sex between my MCs then I didn't get on with the action scene that happened after.

As you can imagine this bogged me down big time. I'm glad I'm breaking out of this self-induced mold. Hopefully, I will be a better, more productive writer for it. Staying interested is still a work in progress for me. I owe it to myself and my fans to finish what I started.

Deleted Scene

2009-06-14T23:42:00.001-04:00

Here is a scene from a current WIP that I took out because the genre changed from historical to steampunk. This scene is for an audience of 18yrs or older and features explicit sex between two consenting ‘male’ adults (for those of you thinking it is Het) The WIP still maintains the same title, despite the big changes elsewhere. It’s called Fair Trade And its my first menage a trois. The following introduces the soon-to-be outlaw/bandits Zee and Braze.

The following picture is how I see Zee in my mind.

Guaranteed there are some errors in here, but don’t squint to find them or your face will get stuck like that.

Zee Calhoun leaned against the hewn log fence that separated the cattle from the open land. They’d just come back from a seven hour haul, rounding cattle up for the count. He was damned tired, sweaty and sore. He hadn’t eaten more than a piece of jerky and a stale biscuit for lunch so his stomach was sticking to his ribs, and the bruise he’d taken from an ornery sow was starting to kick up a fuss—letting the pain be known, but it was his habit to watch the sun touch the land each day as it sunk beyond the horizon.

Settling his hat on a post, Zee braced his elbow on a wooden slat and leaned over, taking some of the pressure off his spine, which was sore too from taking a beating in the saddle. He’d picked up a strand of grass somewhere along his ride during the day and now he twisted the long strand between forefinger and thumb, releasing the musky earthy scent of the blade of grass into the air.

A few pebbles crunched underfoot, warning him of the presence of someone else. Zee didn’t bother to turn around, instead popping the blade of grass in his mouth, he sucked on the bitter root. “I’ll be along in a minute, Braze.”

His friend said nothing. Braze drifted over to Zee’s right, bumping hips on purpose as he settled along the fence next to Zee. A finger curled in Zee’s back pocket, tugging playfully. “You sore.”

Zee shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “Yeah. Not too bad though.” He’d had worse. After a pause he added, “You shouldn’t. Not out here where anybody could see.”

Ignoring him, Braze shoved his entire hand into Zee’s back pocket, fingers curling to frame one hard buttock. Zee sucked in a breath, shifted, but didn’t make any move to dislodge Braze. “There’s an empty stall in the barn, Zee. Ain’t nobody in there but the horses. I just came outta there helping Roger out and he’s belly up by now in his own bunk. Everyone’s flat out tired, ain’t nobody gonna know.”

Despite being tired enough to drift off once his head hit a pillow, Zee was still young, and not immune to the suggestions his best friend was making. It had been a long time since he and Braze had managed a moment alone to take care of business. The job they had at the Westonia ranch was only temporary. Otis Cape was known for keeping a tight leash on his boys. He wasn’t fond of paying folks for entertaining themselves and he was as about as ornery as the sow that had butted Braze earlier. They’d been very careful in the past two months. Hell, in that time Zee and Braze had barely stolen a moment for a quick hand-job while making camp on the range.

Braze’s hand felt incredibly hot even though the denim of his jeans. And Zee’s cock reared inside his jeans, hot and aching, and pearling at the tip, eager for Braze’s callous-roughened fingers to wrap around it.

Braze had to know what effect he was having on Zee, how else could he have known enough to reach around with his free hand and cup the hard bulge between Zee’s legs. Zee groaned, pushing into that hot hand.

“Come on Zee, I’ll suck you off good.”

Zee spit out the blade of grass and nodded his head. “O si gwu.” Switching to his native tongue he agreed to come with Braze.

Grinning like the cat that had caught the canary, Braze tugged Zee along by his belt loops. Zee laughed, swatting Braze’s hands away and holding him at bay until he reached the relative safety of the barn’s big doors. No sooner had the couple disappeared into the barn’s shadow when Braze grabbed two handfuls of Zee’s shirt and pushed the more slender man up against a stall door. The horse occupying the stall behind Zee snorted and shuffled nosily but soon settled down.

The noise didn’t slow Braze up one bit. Like Zee, he knew there was no way the mare could bust loose from behind the big sturdy doors that were higher than the men were tall. Braze, the same height as Zee, didn’t have to search far for what he wanted. Leaning most of his weight to pin Zee against the stall door, Braze crushed their lips together. His tongue flicked over Zee’s lips, hot and agile, demanding entrance.

Zee moaned, body shivering as Braze’s hot tongue pushed into his mouth, exploring every inch with greedy swipes of his tongue. Pulling back a bit, Zee managed to say, “U sga no li.” Slow down.

“Tla.” No. Braze licked and nibbled at Zee’s chin, one big callused hand came up to cup the back of Zee’s neck. His thumb pushed under Zee’s chin urging him to tilt his head up. Braze blazed sucking kisses down his throat, pausing to lave his tongue along Zee’s Adam’s apple. “Hungry for you, Zee.”

Zee moaned, shaking for him. Pushing his hard cock into Braze’s equally hard bulge. His fingers bit into Braze’s broad shoulders, kneading the more muscular man with his long fingers. Braze’s hand refused to be still, plucking at buttons until Zee’s shirt parted, heated lips closed around a tiny brown nipple, sucking hard enough to make Zee arch and cry out. Braze’s hands were already on his jeans, working the zipper down enough for one big hand to push into the denim, wrap around Zee’s uncircumcised cock.

“Braze, yes, please.” Zee squirmed, pleaded. His aches and pains buried beneath a spike of adrenaline and a cloud of lust.

“Want to taste you. Miss this,” Braze murmured sinking down to his knees on the hard concrete, tugging his bronze prize from the confines of Zee’s jeans. Zee’s cock had barely seen daylight before it disappeared into the moist, tight heat of Braze’s mouth.

Zee’s fingers slid into the dark silk of Braze’s hair, his torso nearly curling over Braze’s bowed head as he struggled to keep his feet. He’d missed this too. Before coming to the Westonia ranch Braze had woke him up daily and put him to bed with a blowjob. The man loved nothing better than a hard cock to nurse. Zee liked the feel and power of a having a man’s cock in his mouth, but Braze was purely into it because it got him off.

There was no doubt his friend was making up for lost time. Zee wasn’t going to last long, not with Braze sucking at him like a wind storm. That wicked tongue flicking and teasing every spare inch of his shaft. Braze moans of appreciation mingled with his. Zee combed through Braze’s black hair, undoing his braid with shaky fingers. He was unable to quell the snap of his hips. The feel of the head of his cock bumping into the back of Braze’s throat drove him insane. “Yes,yes! Braze its good.” Zee whimpered. “Uhn Uhn.”

Braze had pity on his dick, drawing off of it long enough to bury his mouth against Zee’s balls. He toyed with them first, licking and sucking, not quite giving Zee the pressure he needed, until finally Zee had had enough. Fisting a handful of his hair, Zee pulled him in close. “Suck them, Braze. I want to feel your mouth on me. Make me come.”

This time it was Braze who whimpered. Zee’s eyes rolled with amazement at the shiver that passed through Braze. The man on his knees had just come in his pants. Braze opened up wide, sucking his balls into his hot mouth, punishing him with his tongue. Zee’s cock twitched, the reddened crown mingling with white pearls of precum.

Bucking his hips, Zee gasped out, “I’m coming!”

Braze planted those big hands on Zee’s thighs, pinning him once again as he lifted his head and swallowed Zee’s cock, taking him just in time to taste the first spurt of cum. Braze took all he had to give, and sucked for several moments after he’d come, tongue flicking over his slit to get every last drop.

(CASE YOUR WONDERING: The men are speaking Cherokee. Chose that tribe because its in my blood and the research would be more interesting. Hell of a time finding the right words. Good times.)

Heh, and don’t ask why they didn’t make it to the stall and just did their stuff barely inside the barn door. Stuff happens, Okay?

Because it must be done...

2009-06-12T13:01:00.008-04:00

Enough is enough already. It's time to face up to the music. The fat lady has sung and she is currently choking on a Twinkie. It must be done. I've known it for years, and I'm doing something starting Monday. Why Monday? Because it gives me the entire week to get my azz in gear. Who starts weight-loss on a Friday? I'd fall right off my schedule if I did. So what am I talking about? I'm talking about the great big elephant in the room, the huge cloud hanging over my head, the monkey on my back. I'm talking about this extra weight I'm carrying. I'm only twenty-three and I'm introverted as all get out. A fun day for me would be sitting on my bottom reading great books or chatting with friends on the web. I've been overweight since I was fourteen or so. It hasn't caused me any problems,yet, which I think God for. I don't breathe heavy, I don't have sleep apnea, I can run faster than most skinny people, I don't have asthma or high blood pressure, I walk fast as hell, can run up stairs without being winded--I guess you can call me a 'functioning fat person'.

And by the way, isn't that a cruel word? A hurtful, confidence-crushing assault on the senses? If someone calls me fat(and that rarely has happened) my confidence level goes to zero in no time flat. I like to think I'm a very confident person, but I'm also very aware of what and who I am. I am fat, or plump, or overweight. Most of my weight is carried in my bum and my hips, which are very curvy. I know that more time than not its the 'truth' that hurts. Call a skinny person fat any day of the week and they'll laugh it off and call you crazy. Call a heavyset person fat and they'll get pissed. The truth hurts. I've always advised people that if they don't like something then change it, but I'm failing to do the same thing for myself.

I don't want to lose weight because people say I need to. Quite frankly, almost no one says I need to. They are very polite. Plus, obesity is so prominent in the U.S. almost everyone will be overweight at one time or another. So, there is no room to talk. I'm losing weight because my cousin took a picture of me while I wasn't looking. It was a picture of me walking away, and I looked like that lady that I said I'd never get as big as. I looked like that woman whose clothes couldn't hide the fact that she had a big belly and wide hips. I looked like that woman who was in danger of getting heart disease, high blood pressure and diabetes. I looked like that woman that didn't care enough to get in shape. I don't want to be that woman anymore.

High-blood pressure runs in my family. My grandfather has had two heart-attacks and two strokes. My great uncle, two great aunts, and a cousin all died of heart attacks. Yet, most of my people live long lives. My Gram and Gramp's on my father's side are in the late seventies. My great aunt in her late eighties and so on, but my grandmother still suffers complications from being overweight. The cartilage in her knees have been worn away from being too heavy. I don't want that for me. I don't want that for my children.

I know this will be a long and hard road. I know this as well as the next overweight person. I'm not in denial of who I am. I know being inactive is a large part of why I am where I am today. I know that my love of bread and potatoes, and fast food has done me in. I'm not the type of person to eat huge amounts, but its what I eat that has brought me here today. Besides that, I'm aware my metabolism is slow. I have to compensate for that. I have to change my lifestyle.

So here it is folks. Sage has got to do something 'before' the troubles begin. I'm not usually one to put my personal stuff out there for the world to see, but it was important to me to write this. I know I'm not the only one who struggles with weight issues. You don't have to look far here in the USA to see that you are not alone. I just wanted to share my story, perhaps it will touch something in someone who reads this. Perhaps it will be the spark that sets fire to that wick of determination. We don't have to be skinny, we don't even have to desire a model figure, but we can be better.

We can do better. Lose weight for yourself. I'm losing weight, personally, because it must to be done...

Favorites of June 2009

2009-06-09T10:30:00.003-04:00

Books
1. Ransom by Lee Rowan
2. Velvet Need by Sean Michaels
3.True Colors by Clare London
4.Turquoise by B.A. Tortuga

Movies
1. Uninvited
2. Underworld:Rise of the Lycans
3. Slumdog Millionaire
4. Zuthura (yeah, I like this movie)

Music
1. Mexican Blackbird "From Dusk til Dawn" Soundtrack
2. Goodbye Apathy sung by OneRepublic
3. Paper Planes sung by M.I.A.
4. I Should Have Been A Cowboy sung by Toby Keith

TV
1. Operation Repo
2. Big Cat Diaries
3. Dirty Jobs with Mike Rowe
4. Meerkat Manor

Timberrrrrrr!

2009-06-08T14:17:00.015-04:00

My Gram's tree got struck by lightning about a week and a half ago. A few days after that half the tree came tumbling down and crushed her fence. It was a mad dash to find someone to clear up the damage, not to mention costly as all get out. Thankfully, because the tree fell the insurance kicked in and picked up the cost. We all knew something needed to be done when the lightning hit, but insurance wouldn't cover it until it fell and we were quoted from 1.5k-3.5k in clean-up costs. I went over to the house this morning. I missed the larger tree being cut up into pieces but I took pictures of the man all the way up the pine (another tree they decided to cut down to be on the safe side).
The guy in the next picture was really, really high up there. His chainsaw, when not in use, was just dangling from a rope. You couldn't pay me to do this job.
The following picture is one of large branches just freshly cut. They lowered them down using the pully system so they just wouldn't fall from the sky like missiles.
In this next pic you can see the guy in the tree from the front of the house. I took this pic from the front. See how far he was up? Can you say heart-attack city? The guy who runs the business said this man had been in taller trees. >_< This is a picture of the ruined fence. The humongous tree that fell was cleaned up before I could get there and take a picture, but here you can see the missing portion. The guy in this picture is standing in the neighbor's yard. His yard is like a forest compared to Gram's now. Also, I was sorely disappointed that there weren't any studs working with their shirts off. :( Heh, there weren't any studs AT ALL.

The next pic is the big tree they had cut up before I got there. You can tell how wide it was. The piled up trunk was split in half by the time I took these photos.

A Steaming pile of... Punk!

2009-06-05T13:25:00.003-04:00

I've decided that the western I've been working on 'only for a short while' will be steampunk. For those of you who don't know what steampunk is, I'll try and summarize it in as few words as possible. According to Wiki Steampunk is a sub-genre of fantasy and speculative fiction that came into prominence in the 1980s and early 1990s. The term denotes works set in an era or world where steam power is still widely used—usually the 19th century, and often Victorian era England—but with prominent elements of either science fiction or fantasy, such as fictional technological inventions like those found in the works of H. G. Wells and Jules Verne, or real technological developments like the computer occurring at an earlier date. Other examples of steampunk contain alternate history-style presentations of "the path not taken" of such technology as dirigibles, analog computers, or digital mechanical computers (such as Charles Babbage's Analytical Engine); these frequently are presented in an idealized light, or with a presumption of functionality. (borrowed directly from Wikipedia)

Anyway, my western/cowboy story is going to be a mix of old and new, and quite impossible inventions. This means I have to come up with some bots that don't exist, and also incorporate some things that do. I think it should be ten times better than a regular historical. Hey, who needs a carriage when you can taken a ride on an airship? Right?

Broken Trailer

2009-05-15T19:23:00.002-04:00

Survey Says

2009-05-14T01:09:00.003-04:00

If you've been following my posts for at least a little while you know I have a wicked sense of humor. What's strange is that it doesn't really come across in my writing. At least I don't think it does. O_o So I took this survey, which I think is like ten times cooler than the regular author information dump. You are now about to peak into the inner workings of my brain. Not literally of course cuz that would just be squishy and gross. lol.

A
- Available: In what sense you perv?
- Age: A lady never tells that she is 23...dayum.
- Annoyance: smacking when eating food.
- Animal: Dog to bite the hell out of the person smacking when eating food.
B
- Beer: Di-scuss-der-ing
- Best Friend: Mom. No, seriously.
- Blind or Deaf: Deaf.
- Best weather: Fall. Not too hot or cold.
- Been in Love:NOPE
- Believe in Magic: See above
- Believe in Santa: See above twice.

C
- Candy:Anything with nuts...I mean uh snickers.
- Color: Blue
- Chocolate/Vanilla: Vanilla
- Chinese/Mexican Food: Chinese. Last Mexican I had sent me running for the border.
- Cake or pie: Both. Mmmm...
- Continent to visit: Asia
- Cheese: If its not moldy I can get it down

D
- Day or Night: Night
- Dancing in the rain: What the hell for?

E
- Eyes: Brown
- Everyone's got: a secret.
- Ever had a crush on a teacher: Sadly, yes.

F
- First thoughts waking up: where did my pillow go?
- Food: meat loaf (mom's tho)
- Greatest Fear: Not finding out what I'm here for.
- Goals: Be Happy!
- Gum: Trident
- Get along with your parents: Mom, yes.

H
- Hair Color: Brownish red.
- Height: 5'7''
- Happy: Nevah
- Holiday: No work and school day.
- How do you want to die: Tapdancing.

I
- Ice Cream: Chocolate chip cookie dough.
- Instrument: Play button.

J
- Jewelry: Will have ring as soon as I go to Walmart.
- Job: Counselor for the ornery.

K
- Kids: I'll get back to you on that, Bob.
- Kickboxing or karate: Gun and bullets?
- Keep a journal: Nah
L
- Love: Fam
- Laughed so hard you cried: Lewis Black for Prez 2016 after Obama reinstates

M
- Milk flavor: All flavors except spoiled.
- Movies: Troy, Man in the Iron Mask, No Country for Old Men, Hancock, Predator
- McD’s or BK: McCrackies

N
- Number: 7

O
- One wish: endless supply of stories I like to read.

P
- Pepsi/Coke: Both.
- Perfect Pizza: Plain cheese. Toppings for the birds.

Q
- Quail: Cheney ruined it for me.

R
- Reality T.V.: Over it already.
- Radio Station: Insert CD.

- Roll your tongue in a circle: I can. We did this experiment in a science class of mine, studying heredity.

S
- Song: Momma Told Me (Not to Come)--Three Dog Night
- Shoe size: 10 women 8.5 Men ( I only buy men sneakers)
- Salad Dressing: Ranch
- Sushi:I pity the FEWL that doesn't cook my damn fish.
- Shower: Like the newspaper: daily.
- Strawberries/Blueberries: Throw em together.

T
- Tattoos: One on my shoulder.
- Time for bed: Late
- Thunderstorms: What in the HELL happened to the cable?

U
- Unpredictable: the economy

V
- Vacation spot(s): Anywhere but here.

W
- Weakness: Books
- Which one of your friends acts the most like you: Nobody I'm a snowflake.
- Worst Weather: Come to CT

X
- X-Rays: On shoulder.

Y
-Year it is now: Year of the Ox. I'm an Ox.
-Yellow: Mountain dew is good.

Z
- Zoo animal: Hamsters.

Broken

2009-05-12T00:12:00.005-04:00

This is my latest story accepted for publication by Total-E-Bound. Projected release is September 2009.

Identical twins Gabriel and Tristan have been apart for seven years, after one twin’s admission of being gay gets him kicked out of the house at seventeen. Leaving his brother behind was one of the hardest things Gabriel has ever had to do. Moving to L.A. to pursue his dreams as a rockstar, Gabriel experiences equal parts luck by starting the up and coming band Thrice Broken, and tragedy, when he falls into the fast and hard life of a drug addict.

Hundreds of miles away, Tristan, riddled with guilt for not having the courage to stand up for his brother, runs into financial ruin just at the peak of his success.

Driven by his desire to look after his younger brother, Gabriel cleans up his lifestyle and separates himself from the man who helped lead him astray. Having achieved his dreams of fame and financial stability, Gabriel calls his brother to L.A. to stay with him until he can get back on his feet.

Yet seven years of pain and regret lie between them, as well as the taboo desire for a love that shouldn’t be. Both brothers know this will be a test of strength and will. Not only is their love forbidden, but being discovered could ruin Gabriel’s public image forever. But their love for each other is only the tip of the iceberg. Tristan will be torn in his loyalty to his brother yet again when their father passes and their mother wants him to move back home. Meanwhile, the ex Gabriel thought he’d cut all ties with nearly a year ago is back, and he’s gunning for revenge. He wants to take out Gabriel’s heart, and it doesn’t take long to discover that Tristan is it.

Favorites of May 2009

2009-05-08T06:01:00.004-04:00

Books
1. Bullriders by Lorne Rodman
2. Hajiri's Pet by Auburnimp and Michael Barnette
2. Private Dicks by Katie Allen
4.Turquoise by BA Tortuga

Movies
1. Monster House
2. Ratatouille
3. Xmen:Origins
4. Me, Myself, and Irene

TV
1. Meerkat Manor
2. Night
3. River Monsters
4. Jon and Kate Plus Eight

Music
1. Wavin' Flag performed by K'naan
2. Soobax performed by K'Naan
3. Dare You to Move performed by Switchfoot
4. Won't Stop performed by OneRepublic

Divine Nine

2009-05-06T02:29:00.005-04:00

Hamlet:
What a piece of work is a man, how noble in reason, how
infinite in faculties, in form and moving how express and
admirable, in action how like an angel, in apprehension how like
a god! the beauty of the world, the paragon of animals—and yet,
to me, what is this quintessence of dust? Man delights not me—
nor woman neither, though by your smiling you seem to say so.~Shakespeare~

Divine Nine

So what’s up with the quote at the beginning of this post. Nothing, I just thought it was nice. Loves me some Hamlet. No but seriously I’m here to talk about heroes. Not just any heroes, but the ones you find in romance. You see I’ve come up with a list of nine men you might find when cracking open a romance(come to think of it you might find these men in LIFE in general). Why not women? Well, maybe that will be my next post. I’m here to present nine different heroes. That’s right, I believe there are nine. If you think there are more, well tell me about it. They may come in different shapes, sizes, and colors but at the heart of the matter they make up the divine nine.

1. Mr. Wonderful
2. Mr. Badass
3. Mr. Confused
4. Mr. Shy
5. Mr. Caveman
6. Mr. Pincushion
7. Mr. Evol
8. Mr. TSTL
9. Mr. E

Mr. Wonderful

I will start with Mr. Wonderful. You may see him most often in the romance genre. He is perfect. He is handsome, available, muscled, educated, well-spoken. *insert sigh here* Oddly enough I find this guy the least bit interesting. Where are his flaws? Someone find a pimple on his ass or something. You know how his story will go. He’ll meet the girl, put on his charm, snag her, bag her, and nine months later she’s preggo. The End. Good riddance.

Occupational hazard: Lawyer, doctor, dentist, veterinarian, CEO

Mr. Badass

*insert evil grin here* I like him. *pats head* Mr. Badass is probably still handsome, intelligent, available, OR he might be banging his next door neighbor, the girl at Rite Mart, AND the ticket ripper at the local theater. He’s going to get into trouble. He’s going to curse. He’s going to growl and complain and roll his eyes and maybe hurt your feelings. He’ll be selfish (a little). He’s the do-things-his-way (which usually means breaking rules) hero. He’ll find the girl, sleep with her sister, apologize and put on some Berry White. Snag her. Bag her. And shove some birth control pills in her hand. Hey, he’s not done riding his Harley and he’ll be damned if he’s driving a minivan with a baby car seat just now. AnyHOO at the end of the day Mr.Badass does the right thing.

Occupational Hazard: Tattoo Artist, Construction Worker, Bartender, Repair Shop Owner, Professional Jewelry Thief

Mr. Confused

He doesn’t know whether he’s coming or going. He doesn’t know if he wants to be married or remain a bachelor. He can’t even remember where he left his briefcase this morning. Mr. Confused is probably handsome. (Aren’t they all?). He’s working a boring nine-to-five until he figures out what he wants to do with his life. Mr. Confused might even be that guy who dates women when he really is attracted to men. We see that a lot in gay fiction. He doesn’t want to be ostracized by the public but his heart just isn’t into the fairer sex. You will most likely have your heart wrenched for Mr. Confused. He goes through a lot of trials and tribulations before he ends up with Mr or Mrs. Right.

Occupational Hazard: Office assistant, Clerk, College Kid, Photographer

Mr. Shy

“He blushed. His cheeks flushed. He ducked his head. His hand trembled. He dropped his keys and then kicked them under the car. He was nervous. His stomach flip-flopped.” What are these, you ask? Well, these are all reading cues that let you know you are dealing with Mr. Shy. He’s a very popular hero to use in gay fiction. Hell, I like to use him myself. Most het fiction won’t use a guy like this because, well, Mr. Badass or Mr. Wonderful and even Mr. Cavemen are hotter when it comes to heating up ze bedroom. Mr. Shy might also be a geek, whipcord thin, maybe even effeminate or androgynous. He’ll get the girl. (by accident) or he’ll get the guy, because the guy will be pursuing him.

Occupational Hazard: Artist, Computer Techie, College Student, Engineer

matthias

Mr. Caveman

Meet Crug. He’s one step away from bopping you on the head and dragging you off to his cave. You love to hate this guy, and though you’re sure the heroine should shoot him in the leg, you still *swoon* when he tells her she’s his woman. Mr. Caveman is a combination of Mr. Wonderful (smart, handsome, successful, muscular) but he has all the characteristics of Mr. Badass. (Dominant, smug, bossy) He just gets away with it because he’s handsome. Mr. Crug…I mean, Mr. Caveman will have his happily ever after because his super sperm will get Mrs. Caveman pregnant and they’ll live happily ever after.

Occupational Hazard: Caveman, Soldier, Firefighter, CEO, Inherited Wealth (Secretive business)

Mr. Pincushion

Hey, can I have twenty bucks? Yeah, this guy will give you his last two cents. He’s the caretaker who inadvertently became everyone’s walking mat. He thinks everyone is his friend. He’s a handsome, likeable guy, OR he might just be average looking but intelligent or wealthy. You feel so bad for Mr. Pincushion but on the other hand you want to smack the hell out of him and tell him to grow a spine. Mr. Pin will eventually find his happily ever after. It could be with Mrs. Right or Mrs. Loving, OR a Dom named Jackal who beats the snot out of all the people taking advantage of him.

Occupational Hazard: Accountant, Doctor, Teacher, Musician, Inherited Wealth, Manager, Store Owner, Scientist

hunk_zwartwit

Mr. Evol

He’s not a hero! Course not. He’s not like Mr. Badass at all. He’ll steal lollipops from babies and push little old ladies to the back of the line. He’s handsome (You knew that was coming) with higher than average intelligence (how else do you think he avoided the police) Mr. Evol is selfish, greedy, stubborn, and seemingly unstoppable. He’s also VERY rare as a protagonist. Who’ll ever love this black-hearted scoundrel? Well, apparently, there is such a thing as redemption. There is always a loophole that wins Mr. Evol into the hearts of others. Take Robin Hood for example: He stole from the rich and gave to the poor. Hey, but he wasn’t evil you say to yourself, right? Right. That’s why I spelled it Evol, its short for Evolution. Yeah, I just made that up. Mr. Evol goes through an evolution in the book. He starts off being a selfish black-hearted scoundrel (I really love that phrase) but he ends up changing his ways. Maybe he gives the fat ruby he stole to an orphanage. It usually takes the stubborn will of a good-hearted heroine OR hero to help him change his ways. On the rare occasion Mr. Evol goes from good to bad. Either way this character is evolutionary and bound for a happy ending—or, some time in prison. *shrugs*

Occupational Hazard: Thief, Drug-Lord, Kingpin, Assassin, Pirate, Mercenary

Mr. TSTL (too stupid to live)

Burn this after reading. That’s what Mr. TSTL makes you want to do to your book. If he were a hero he’d be the one who showed up to rescue the woman in the burning building after she’d thrown a mattress out the window and rescued herself. If the answer is obvious Mr. TSTL will never comprehend it. He’s prone to misunderstandings. He whines. He does a lot of introspection and still comes up with a big fat nothing. Mr.TSTL pisses the heroine or hero off with his sheer stupidity and thoughtlessness. To be fair he isn’t a bad guy, just not the brightest light bulb in the bunch. By some freak of nature he gets a HFN or a HEA. You’ll probably care less though.

Occupational Hazard: In the interest of being diplomatic I won’t fill in an occupation here.

Mr. E

Holy Cow! I’m almost done. Mr. E is a ‘mystery’ you get it? J (I was tired when I wrote this. Don’t blame me) Anyway, Mr. E is not someone you’d expect. He’s not the typical hero. He might be overweight, handicapped, or a freaking shapeshifter. Mr. E is here to shake things up. He’ll never do what you expect of him. He’s a wicked combination of almost all the Misters I’ve mentioned so far. If Mr. E was a superhero he’d probably be the antihero turned hero, turned antihero again. Mr. E’s job is to be mysterious and standoffish. He’s the man you want to know more about. He’s the one the town calls a murderer when in reality his best friend died in a car accident. Contrary to popular belief, Mr. E did not strangle him to death. Mr. E might be a killer on the gossip mills but later you find out he’s a retired veterinarian that still takes in animals. Mr. E might also be a mountain man who’s gruff on the outside, but has a heart of gold. If Mr. E finds Mr. or Mrs. Right it isn’t because he went out looking. His other half will have to come to him.

Occupational Hazard: It’s a Mr. E. (You SO knew I was gonna say that.)

Favorites of April 2009

2009-04-07T21:01:00.004-04:00

Books
1. Broken Boundaries by Evangeline Anderson
2. A Fostered Love by Cameron Dane
3. Love Jamie by AKM Miles
4. Homesteads and Horseradish by Kiernan Kelly

Movies
1. Jurassic Park
2. The Haunting in CT
3. Transformers
4. Alex Rider

TV
Not much this month

Music
1. Morning Has Broken by Cat Stevens
2. I'm No Angel by Dido
3.Momma Told me Not to Come by Three Dog Night
4. Lookin Boy by Style's P.

The Phirst Hunger (On Hiatus)

2009-03-21T11:15:00.004-04:00

First off, I'd like to apologize for those of you patiently waiting for G-Strain's sequel. It WILL come, just not as soon as I hoped. At the moment I am having publisher woes. Do to irreconcilable differences I will no longer be writing fresh material for my current publisher and it looks as if I'll have to wait for my contracts to expire to get my rights back. So, The Phirst Hunger is on hold and I will be continuing with my Western after Pride Fall. Again, my heartfelt apologies.

Fish gotta swim...birds gotta eat. I gotta type.

2009-03-11T21:49:00.005-04:00

So my new wulfish novel is coming along quite well. Man, is there more action than ever before. Lots of sexual tension but no love scenes just yet. Hmmm, may even make it to my 60k word goal. *g*

Keepers

2009-03-04T17:40:00.011-05:00

I've gone quite mad on ebook shopping sprees. Now that I can actually afford to purchase almost anything I want, I just can't seem to help myself. Though only reading gay fiction (at least on ebooks) helps maintain a healthy wallet because gay fiction is still not as prominent as het, but anyway I've come to value a few good books that I'd recommend to ANY gay fiction reader. I think these stories are quite the gems. In fact I pull them up quite frequently just to ogle and reread. There might be more, but for now I'll list my top ten. This is a ten-way tie. No book is more favored than the other for the top spot.

Favorites of March 2009

2009-03-02T12:04:00.002-05:00

Books
1. Out of My Mind by M.L. Rhodes
2.Souls Deep by M.L. Rhodes
3. When Harry Met Jason by Sean Michaels
4. The One That Got Away by Rhianne Aile and Madeleine Urban

Movies
1. Ratatouille
2. Wall-E (yeah I'm in kid mode)
3. Underworld: Rise of the Lycans
4. Appaloosa

TV
1. Cops
2. Reba
3. Most Shocking Videos
4. Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

Music
1. White Flag performed by Dido
2. Morning Has Broken performed by Cat Stevens
3. You Can't Win (The Wiz) performed by Michael Jackson
4. Invincible performed by MJ

A Second Wind

2009-02-17T14:08:00.002-05:00

Finally I have caught a second wind on the progress front. I'm blazing through the finish of my next novella, Broken. Currently I have just a few thousand more words to go and then with edits I'll probably add and minus here and there. For a few weeks I was caught up on what I wanted to do next. Out of all the scenes that would not come to me it was the sex scenes that came hardest. I had to do something new, something different, because sex can become quite repetitive after you've read a few hundred scenes. I've got the drive to write, my only problem now is finding the time, but I am determined. My fans are waiting patiently for my next installments and I'm eager to deliver.

#1 Bestseller of 2008

2009-02-11T08:13:00.002-05:00

WOOT! TORN YAY!

Favorites of February 2009

2009-02-04T23:32:00.002-05:00

Books
1. Mile High by G.A. Hauser
2. Wes and Toren by J.M. Colail
3. Lovers and Dreamers by Willa Okati
4. Stealing West by Jamie Craig

Movies
1. Appaloosa
2. Edward Scissorhands
3. Be Careful Who You Let In
4. The Family that Preys

TV
1. Intervention
2. Fist of Freedom (documentary)
3. Cosby Show
4. Snapped

Music
1. Paper Planes by M.I.A.
2. Sleep performed by OneRepublic
3. Here it Goes Again by Ok Go
4. Best of Me by Mya

Catching up

2009-01-31T12:02:00.005-05:00

Usually I like to purchase books in spurts. By that I mean buy half a collection if its out and wait months...and months to buy the rest of them or when the entire series is out. I'm a big fan of Karen Marie Moning. Me? The Manlove trollop? Yeah, I have a verra small group of authors that write Het Romance that I'll still read. Karen is one of them, Teresa Meideros, Sasha Lord, and some others. Anyway, I'm waiting for Karen's entire fae series books to drop. Why? Cuz despite how slow I am with my own writing I don't want to start a series(this only applies to short ones) before it is finished, if I know about it. So I'm waiting for all books to drop before I read it. Thank goodness there are other authors to read in between the wait. Currently I am catching up on reading for Laurell K. Hamiliton. I bought her collection for the Merry Gentry series and the Anita Blake series about a year and a half ago. Its been nearly a year since I bought the last book. Just this week though I started reading "A Lick of Frost". I really enjoyed the story, and I marvel at Laurell's ability to write five chapters in the same room in a span of hours. The lady is genius. So, I kind of devoured ALF and now I'm going out to purchase the next book in the series: "Swallowing Darkness". I'd recommend anyone to check Laurell's books out if you are a fan of paranormal and you like your lovin' a tad on the wicked side.

Menage a Trois :Fair?

2009-01-20T21:24:00.003-05:00

They say that the ultimate fantasy for a man is to have two women at the same time. So, shouldn't the same be true for women? Some women, yes. Others, no. In the world of fiction an increasingly popular theme is two guys and a girl. I admit that this theme can have a certain appeal. You would have to be pretty dull (as a woman) not to be at least flattered by the prospect of having two handsome, young, intelligent males vying for you attention and in most cases willing to share. Yet, as an author of gay fiction I always have the nagging thought of why in the heck a man would want to share ONE woman with another man. I mean, this happens in plenty of stories but no one ever really explains why the character wants to share. Does a 'straight' man really want to see 'his' woman having sex with another guy? IMO, hell no. That guy has got to have some latent gay feelings. If not then why does it turn him on to see his woman having sex with someone else. Must he not also appreciate the beauty of a male form if that said male is bangin' away with his wife or girlfriend? I'd like to think that in this case a man is definitely bi. And I won't even get too deep into the discussion on the case of brothers. Outside of science fiction, where usually the excuse is a triad relationship of some sort, why in the hell would two brothers want to come within kissing distance of each other while being intimate with the same woman? Now, if you've ever read Torn you know I don't have a problem with it. I just don't get the reasoning behind triads outside of Science Fiction.

In any case I find myself unable to read these stories any longer. For me, if there is a triad the pleasure must be equally shared, which means the males are bi. I can't get my head wrapped around the unfairness that a woman has two men to chose from. If she's pissed with Peter she can go to Paul. Yet if Paul gets the cold shoulder he has to wait for Anna? So, no, I'm not a fan of menage a trois involving supposedly straight men. Fairness all around, I say. :D

Work In Progress

2009-01-18T18:55:00.004-05:00

Currently I am working on juggling two stories simultaneously. One of which is my second twincest novel after Torn. This one is entitled Broken. This story is not exactly a sequel, as the main characters in my first novel do not show up here. To provide a little information about the story, Broken is about twin brothers that have been separated for seven years because their father kicked one of them out of the house when he found out he was gay. Do to fear they stayed apart until the age of twenty-four, when hard times came upon the twin who stayed home and forces him to join his brother in L.A. From there attraction ensues, old hurts flare, and a struggle to find a happy balance between their taboo love and their place in the world.

My second WIP is entitled Pride Fall. It tells the story of headstrong Pride who is a product of his namesake. Hypothetically once a werewulf turns twenty-five he goes into rut, and his reaction triggers a like response in his mate. This has not happened for Pride's pack, the Shandai in almost a hundred years, but that bad streak breaks with Pride. Only, his wulf chooses a mate Pride cannot condone. His wolf has chosen Levi Whitley. But Pride is not gay, or so he tells him. :D

After I finish these stories up I'm off to write on the sequel to G-Strain which tells the story of Jared and Dawa. To find out more about G-Strain, my Science Fiction m/m novel, just click on the cover of the e-book to the right side of my blog.

After G-Strain I'm not sure. I've got a dozen stories in my head. One which is clambering to get out is a menage a trois story featuring a half-breed cowboy who goes by the name of Zee, and his partner and sometimes lover Braze. The third party to their triangle is a reluctant fancy-pants Yankee named Nicholas. He is traveling from New York to Colorado with his older sisters Amanda and Elizabeth to visit their guardian who is a an oil baron. When Nicholas's train gets set upon by 'outlaws' the rich threesome are kidnapped for ransom. Nicholas' greatest concern is seeing to the safety of his sisters. He doesn't even dream that Braze and Zee, the leaders of their little band of desperados might prefer men. Needless to say the setting for the story is in the old west. I Don't have a title in mind for this story yet.

Favorites of January 2009

2009-01-10T03:43:00.003-05:00

Books
1. Lover's Knots by Katherine Cross
2. When Harry Met Jason by Seam Micheals
3. Aidan and Ethan: Redemption by Cameron Dane
4. Fantasies Thanksgiving by Cassandra Gold

Movies
1. Batman Begins
2. No Country for Old Men
3. Uncle Buck
3. Pitch Black

TV
Really nothing much this month

Music
1. Tainted Love performed by Marilyn Manson
2. Prodigal performed by OneRepublic
3. Hard Times performed by Ray Charles
4. Won't Stop performed by OneRepublic

Red Lining

2008-12-20T10:51:00.002-05:00

I just got wind of another internet scandal that is circulating here. A short story entitled "Beautiful C*cksucker" is making pretty big waves. As I understand it a number of people are offended by this title. The author Barbara Sheridan has explained her use of it, apparently it was used by one of the main characters in her story. So, what about me? What do I think? I think that Ms. Sheridan has the right to use what every terminology that she wishes, just as readers have the right to complain about it. Now, it if was me I would not have used this term. Why? Because quite frankly cocksucker is offensive. But its not Ms. Sheridan's fault, that view of the word came about by bigots and hatemongers who slung it around with no regard to who they were hurting.
I can understand why gays/lesbians/heterosexuals, hell, anyone would be offended by the term. I have a few terms that offend me as well. Just the other day I was watching TruTV and a case came up where a coroner described the hair they found on a bedsheet as Negroid? I was like WTF is Negroid hair? Needless to say, I turned. I was seriously not feeling that show after that. Anyway, the fate of the book and its title does not rest in my hands. I am curious to see what will come of all this though.

One other thing that boggles my mind. If the book title was not percieved before its release as offensive why turn the 'o' in cocksucker into a star. Its like internet shorthand for sites that don't allow cussing. We all know what it says, so why the star, eh? I wonder. Anyhoo, I think I'm done giving my two cents. Good luck to Ms. Sheridan. I wish her all the best.

Favorites of December

2008-12-09T12:52:00.005-05:00

Books

1. Altered Heart by Kate Steele

2. Looking for Some Touch by K. Z. Snow

3. Highest Bidder Kate Steele

4. Not In Kansas by R.G. Alexander

Movie

1. Hancock

2. Hellboy 2: The Golden Army

3. Pollyanna

4. The Parent Trap (1961 version)

1. It's Me or the Dog

2. Dogs 101

3. Survivor Man

4. Cha$e

Music

1. Star by The Roots

2. Dare you to Move by Switchfoot

3. Get Me Bodied by Beyonce

4. Hard Knock Life by Jay-Z

Jive Turkey

2008-11-22T20:24:00.002-05:00

The Thanksgiving
Denture Adventure

The day was a nightmare; I'll try to explain
the nieces and nephews and grandchildren came,
and grandpa and grandma had just spent the week,
this holiday dinner was more than unique.

The turkey was nestled all snug in the stove
as the moochers arrived at my door by the drove,
already regretting inviting this breed,
as their jackets came off and the children were freed.

They stood there and glared like a posse possessed,
just plotting and scheming some torture, I guessed,
then lo and behold, like a bat out of hell,
they turned on us grown-ups like some evil spell.

While setting the table I let out a shriek,
when a tiny white mouse from my gravy boat peeked!
Then pickles went flying and pies hit the floor;
I found a dead worm in the silverware drawer.

As soda was spilling and olives were tossed,
I thought about having my own holocaust,
poor grandpa and grandma were fit to be tied,
and hubby kept mumbling the word 'homicide'!

The dog ran and hid after grabbing his bone,
and I fled to the kitchen to be left alone,
the house was in chaos--beyond my belief,
when grandma cried, "Help me--I can't find my teeth!!"

I said they were soaking right next to her bed,
then gramps said, "Forget it...the woman's brain-dead!"
This started her bawling as bad went to worse,
I reached for the aspirin while chanting a curse.

While searching the house grandma sputtered and choked,
and I wondered which brat took her teeth as a joke,
but my thought was short-lived as a crisis arose,
someone's kid had a carrot stick lodged up their nose!

The turkey was done, so we sat down to eat
with poor grandma still sporting a look of defeat,
this Thanksgiving madness had altered her mood
for she hadn't her dentures to savor the food.

I dished out the dressing and to my surprise
a pair of false-teeth lay in front of my eyes!
I'd have left out the spices if only I'd known...
that the stuffing I cooked had a 'bite' of it's own!

The day had arrived; 'twas exactly one year
since my relatives, (moochers), had Thanksgiving here,
poor Grandpa was already stewed to the gills,
and Grandma--disgusted, was popping pink pills.

The turkey was turning a rich, golden hue
while children were screeching, "There's nothing to do!"
And memories from last year still had me spell-bound
when inside my stuffing Gran's dentures were found!

Soon mean Uncle Henry called--fit to be tied,
offended that no one would give him a ride
to this festive occasion--he's such an old crab,
so he cursed one and all, then he phoned for a cab.

His arrival came soon, not that anyone cared,
the adults began groaning, the children were scared,
then I noticed a change as I hugged him with dread--
he was sporting a rug on the top of his head!

A pie made of pumpkin shot into my view
being used to play catch; out the window it flew,
and I thought for a minute just who was to blame
as my prized candied yams disappeared down the drain.

My husband, the whiner, quick pulled me aside
and bribed me with cash for a place he could hide,
with my baster now loaded and aimed at his butt,
he crawled back to the couch, made a face, then shut-up.

A frog and a hamster decided to play
on the counter by Auntie, preparing souflee
with the aide of old Henry; they both stopped to stare,
then she screamed and he raced from the kitchen--sans hair!

When asked he replied, "Gee, I had it before--
but perhaps in my haste it fell off on the floor."
So we all made a search, but the hunt was in vain,
now poor Henry had nothing to blanket his brain.

Recalling what Auntie had started to make,
I put the large crock in the oven to bake,
then called for the vultures in voice sugar-sweet,
"Let's move it, you morons--we're ready to eat!!"

The turkey was carved when the timer rang out,
Auntie's dish didn't raise so I started to doubt
that ingredients used in her famous souflee
would've called for an ugly, synthetic toupee.

And lo and behold, as I dug through the dish
all smothered in egg whites--a hairy, Oh Ish!!
These Thanksgiving dinners, My God! I declare...
if it ain't someone's dentures, it's somebody's hair!

~ Copyright © Terry Lerdall-Fitterer ~

Bad Boys and... music?

2008-11-17T19:19:00.004-05:00

I was floundering for a little while on my story Pride Fall. I was writing a really kick ass scene and I just couldn't get on with it. Also one of my protagonists was not talking, I mean I COULD not get the guy to clue me in on his personality. And then I found it;the gem that got me writing again. It turned out to be music. Now I find myself assigning music to my characters so that I can get into their mindset. For Pride I listen to Bad Things, it's the theme song for the popular HBO show True Blood. I also listen to The Man Comes Around and for a softer side I listen to Fastball's Out of My Head. Pride really is turning out to be a hotshot with a bad temper, but he's got a heart of gold even if you have to kick in the tin door to get to it. For Levi who is like the complete opposite of Pride I listen to softer stuff like I Stumble sung by Macy Gray. It really does sum up Levi's feelings towards Pride. I also am fond of Jeff Buckley, OneRepublic (all their stuff) and Bryan Adams when I'm writing Levi. Awe, he's such a sweetie. I hope he is as well loved by the fans as I love him.

Young Heroes

2008-11-09T14:36:00.004-05:00

I never cease to be amazed by the bravery of children. This little boy was no exception, selfless in life and fearless of death.

Interview with Jared, Kenano, and Nurak

2008-11-06T22:25:00.002-05:00

Check out my interview with Gideon at Playground Mystique. Gideon was nice enough to invite me, Kenano, Jared, and Nurak from my Science Fiction/Gay Erotic Novella G-Strain in for a little chat.

Dr. King Would Smile, I Think

2008-11-05T22:33:00.004-05:00

Well, do I really have to say it? No. All over the world, on the internet, television, in newspapers, and by word of mouth, it is being said that Barack Obama is the first elected black president of the United States. Though I still refer to him as biracial, it is not my wish to detract from the significance of this event. I thought it would just be nice to post some pictures of him on my blog, so that perhaps when I am in my forties and fifties and god-willing have children of my own I can pull up this old blog and point to the date, and say "See, I witnessed History being made. I guess we all live in our huge slice of history. I may have missed Vietnam, World War I and II, but I lived through the horrifying pivotal point that was 9/11. I've seen the worse president we've ever had be re-elected a second time, and I've seen Barack Obama make history. I am happy to have lived in this generation. It was said all along that the younger generation would play a crucial part in the election of Barack and it appears that we have.

"A genuine leader is not a searcher for consensus but a molder of consensus. "
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Favorites of November

2008-11-02T21:56:00.003-05:00

Books
1. Hell Cop (Best Anthology I have EVER read) Astrid Amara, Nicole Kimberling, Ginn Hale
2. Lover and Commander by Jez Morrow
3. Del Fantasma: Unicorn by Jet Mykles
4. Reckless Seduction by Amanda Young

Movies
1. Monster House
2. Day of the Dead
3. Corrina, Corrina
4. Tears of the Sun

TV
1. Dirty Jobs w/Mike Rowe
2. Snapped
3. CNN (election coverage)
4. Countdown 100 greatest moments in Horror Movies

Music
1. Naive by The Kooks
2. Sleep by OneRepublic
3. The Way I am by Ingrid Michaelson
4. The Scientist by Coldplay

Don't Cure Me

2008-11-02T21:49:00.004-05:00

They say the first step is admitting you have a problem. Well, I admit it. I find myself cruising over five different e-book sites (all of which are bookmarked) looking for the newest and latest, and sometimes greatest manlove erotica/romance releases. Some of my favorite authors get hit up about twice a week to check on progress. I even check to see when the covers come out, updates about releases, excerpts and whatnot. I spend money I don't have on droves of books and yet when I am done reading I want MORE! Yeah, I have an addiction to gay fiction. I also happen to write it, so I guess its a double addiction. So anyone who reads my stuff and looks up here to see what I might be up to, know that you are not alone. I'm as rabid a manlove fan as the next person. I don't want to be cured though I do need to manage my reading time better.

Keep Looking

2008-10-31T01:55:00.007-04:00

Alas, I find myself speaking of politics once more, but what is a girl to do when she watches CNN like a rabid wide-eyed beast? Why talk of politics of course. I just have to get this issue off my chest. While visiting blogs on *gasp* CNN I have come across quite a few comments where voters express a desire to have a candidate that "represents" them. That is all good and well I suppose, but unless we appoint a school teacher, a janitor, or the manager of Walgreens as President of the United States you are never going to have someone who is like YOU! The best we can do is look at personal ethics, beliefs, and policies. We can look at the character of the man or woman and delve into their history to see their accomplishments, but to pick someone as your next president based on that fact that they are mothers or fathers just like you is simply ridiculous. The notion that governor Palin is a good romodel for "all" women, because she is a soccer mom, executive of her state and apparently a woman who has practiced unethical conduct is simply absurd. She has never and will never be relateable to me. I have nothing in common with the woman. People please stop generalizing. I have very few things in common with Obama either. I am not a man, father, or husband and I certainly don't make his salary. I've never been to law school nor served as senator. I'll get over it. I'm not picking Obama because he grew up with one sister and his mother like I did. I'm not picking Obama because his mother worked two jobs all my life so she could support us like mine did. I'm not picking him because he is a female college student like I am. I am picking him because I believe his ideas and policies are exactly what this country needs. When you start inserting your 'need' for common factors into the equation it breeds room for the question of race, gender, and age. People need to stop choosing with their eyes and use their brains. I, for one, will be ecstatic when this election is over. Both the intelligence and ignorance of America has been put on display in this race. If you are looking for your twin in office all I have to say is keep looking!

Un(freaking)believable

2008-10-24T15:11:00.005-04:00

I'm not one to write much about Politics on this blog, but it is just crazy what crap comes out of the mouths of "professionals" sometimes. Honestly, does no one sit down and run their speech or ideas by a critique partner. They really should take up the habits of some authors. Whether you are a Pub or Dem I'm sure you can agree that this was the ultimate foot in mouth statement of the election. Jeez. If you watch the video below, you'll know what I'm talking about.

What-chu-ma-call-its?

2008-10-21T15:42:00.002-04:00

On one of my endless name searching journeys I came across a few sites with some of the most unusual names I've ever heard. I thought I'd share.

Optimus Prime

Optimus Prime (born 1971) is a U.S. Army Ohio National Guard firefighter.Named after a character in the Transformers cartoon series. He changed it legally on his 30th birthday and shows up on drivers licence and id's

Winner and Looser Lane

Winner and Loser Lane are the sixth and seventh children of Robert Lane, respectively. They are notable primarily for their unusual first names, but also for their fate being quite the reverse of what their names would suggest. (Totally unfair to the child named Looser.)

The only noteworthy achievement of Winner Lane, born in 1958, is his criminal record - nearly three dozen arrests for burglary, domestic violence, trespassing, resisting arrest and other crimes.

On the contrary, Loser Lane, born in 1961, graduated from Lafayette College in Pennsylvania, and joined the New York Police Department. He eventually advanced to become sergeant.

Cardinal Sin

Jaime Cardinal Sin, was a priest of the Roman Catholic Church in the Philippines. He led the Archdiocese of Manila as its archbishop and was later elevated to the rank of cardinal by Pope Paul VI.

Cotton Mather

Cotton Mather (born 1663) was a socially and politically-influential "Puritan" minister, prolific author, and pamphleteer. Author of more than 450 books and pamphlets, Cotton Mather's ubiquitous literary works made him one of the most influential religious leaders in America.

Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116

Pronounced /'al,bin/, Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116 was the name intended for a Swedish child who was born in 1991.
The boy's parents had planned to never legally name him at all, as a protest to the strict child-naming rules of the Swedish government. (Poor kid)

Sadly after this name was rejected the parents tried to name the baby "A". That too was rejected. I have no idea what the finalized named turned out to be.

Moon Unit Zappa

Frank Zappa, the famous american singer, guitarist, composer and satirist had four children, which he named: Moon Unit, Dweezil, Ahmet Emuukha Rodan, and Diva Muffin Zappa.

Thursday October Christian

Thursday October Christian (born October 1790) was the first son of Fletcher Christian (leader of the mutiny on the HMAV Bounty) and his Tahitian wife Maimiti. He was conceived on Tahiti, and was the first child born on Pitcairn after the mutineers took refuge on the island.

World B. Free (born 1953) is a former professional basketball player who played in the NBA from 1975-1988. World was known as the "Prince of Midair" as well as "All-World". In 1980, he had his first name legally changed from "Lloyd" to "World".

Eagle-Eye Cherry sees everything

This American-Swedish singer is known best for his hit "Save Tonight". The name Eagle-Eye was given to him at birth because his father thought he had the eyes of an eagle. Luckily, the father didn't noticed he also had pig's hands.

Picabo Street

Picabo Street (born April 3, 1971 in Triumph, Idaho) is an American skier, now retired and living in Portland, Oregon. She is named after the town of Picabo, Idaho, and was raised on a small farm in Triumph. She first joined the United States Ski Team in 1989, at the age of 17.

Quoted from Funny and Unusual names by Richard Pettinger.

Can't Buy Me Love

2008-10-15T18:25:00.003-04:00

This is going to be a very, very short rant. What I wanted to mention are the ridiculous prices I am finding now on ebooks. I mean I thought the purpose of ebooks was that it was quicker and cheaper than paperback. It isn't as if publishers have to pay printing companies for ink, paper, and labor. It isn't as if a lumberjack goes out in the great wilderness, cuts down a tree, and hauls it back to mill-land. I don't mind super plus novels edging up there at seven or eight dollars. I mean I might wince a little, but really, its SUPER PLUS! But... I draw the line at purchasing books 100 pages long for $7.99. That is more expensive than a paperback from a newbie author, and trust me these novels are from newbies. I won't mention the companies. They know who they are and I know who they are and if you do some browsing, soon, you'll know too. All I'm saying is I can't stand to pay for it. I'm on a college student budget. I love me some manlovin' but not at that expense.

Stubborn Blokes

2008-10-13T21:27:00.010-04:00

So, I've been inspired to try a new tactic with my characters and writing. Authors always say that their characters 'speak' to them in a sense. Not so for my characters. Stories play out much like a movie in my head, and I get to sit on the sidelines and wait. But... I'm willing to try and talk to these stubborn blokes, if only they would tell me what hot smexiness they desire. Okay, given Pride is a stubborn hunk, I can expect him to be tight-lipped, but come on Levi. You've got to give me something dang-it. So here is my attempt to drag Pride out of the closet, slap Levi down at my interview table and get this baby written. Call me crazy if you like. Pride sure does. Lol :p

SW=Me
PM= Pride McKeon
LK= Levi Keegan

SW: Welcome boys...urm I mean men. Would you like to introduce yourselves?.............HELLO?! Damnit! Get your cute asses over here now. SPEAK!" *twinkles fingers at the reader who is currently shaking his/her head* hehe

PM:* Cocks lovely blond head to the side.* What?

SW: You're supposed to be charming Mr. Man. How in the hell do you expect readers to like your if you're an arse?!

PM: *Wicked grin. Pulls up shirt.*

SW: Oh, dayum. Okay, stop that pretty boy. Since I am the only one who can see you, you don't score any brownie points with the audience. Tell them about yourself. Better yet tell them why you won't co-operate. And...where in the hell is Levi? *dies*

LK: I'm here. I'm here. *jabs thumb at Pride* Its his fault I'm late.

SW: *perks up* Really? What were you guys doing...I mean tell the audience what you look like.

LK: *Frowns* Urm, isn't that your job? You made us up after all.

SW: Yes, yes, I know but its more fun if you do it. Kay? *pleads with eyes for some understanding*

LK: Oh, okay. This is me basically. *digs around in pocket for photo and hands it to me*

*puts up photo*

SW: Deezam! I should have written a dictionary with you in it by now.

LK: *beams* Don't know why its so hard ... I mean difficult to write Sage. I'm a likable guy. I'm easy.

SW: *pouts* No, really you're not. Why won't you talk to me? I need ideas. Wait...*looks around* Where did Pride go? See, this is what I mean. You guys come and go, leaving me stranded!

PM: Calm down, Sage. Easy. I just went to get this. *hands me his picture* I don't get the whole purpose of this thread, but okay. Its your ball game.

SW: Grins. Thanks you guys. For once you're co-operating.

*posts picture*

SW: *eyes bug out* Good grief, Charlie Brown. How old are you guys?"

LK: *blushes, but then sticks his chin out* I"m nineteen.

PM: Twenty-five.

SW: Why so young?

LK: Shrugs. Twenty five is the age of Pride's Mate Run. *scratches head* Urm... you made us this age, Sage.

SW: Oh, yeah, well you guys pretty much told me what to do. I'm not driving this particular car. You guys are. Are you going to stick around from here on out?

LK: Yes. I want to see what happens too.

PM: Yes. I ran into Kehoe from another one of your WIPS and he says his ass is going to sleep from sitting on the sidelines.

SW: Kehoe said that? Uh oh. Kehoe's a werewolf.

PM: That explains why his hackles rose when confronted with another Alpha.

SW: So you're the Alpha!

PM: *grins and shoots me a knee-to-pudding sultry look* You doubt me, Sage?

SW: Nuh uh.

LK: Save some for later pretty boy.

SW: Oh, he's jealous. *looks on wide eyed*

PM: *Struts toward Levi and stops mere inches from the smaller man. He tilts Levi's head up and looks him in the eyes* No need to worry cub, I'm not through with you yet.

LK: *visibily shivers*

SW *clears throat* Um... so, we seem to be getting somewhere now, right?

PM: *Winks at me* Oh, yeah. We're getting somewhere.

SW: Okay! Okay! Break it up! Break...it... up! No teasing the audience until the excerpts.

PM: *Shrugs, and takes a step back from Levi* Its your show, Sage.

SW: Um... thank you... I think. Now, about those demons...

Well those are my boys. Pride is a bit...well prideful. He's got a big ego and needs to be smacked in the head a few times before he grounds himself. But smack I shall. Never you fear. Levi is more laid back, but he's definitely no push-over. Unless he wants it of course, and trust me Pride makes him want it really,really bad. I'm signing off now, boys and girls. Time to bring the steam. Anyone got any dark chocolate?

Favorites of October

2008-10-13T11:54:00.003-04:00

Books
1. Knowing Caleb by Cameron Dane (awesome writer, I want to be her when I grow up, hehe)
2. Creation's Control by Marie Harte
3. Handyman by Claire Thompson
4. Altered Heart by Kate Steele

Movies
1. Monster House
2. 28 Days Later
3. Lean on Me
4. Final Destination

TV
1. Dirty Jobs w/Mike Rowe
2. Trueblood (HBO series based on Sookie Stackhouse from Charlaine Harris)
3. Tales From the Crypt
4. Project Runway

Music
1. He's the Wizard from soundtrack "The Wiz"
2. You Can't Win sung by Michael Jackson
3. Paper Planes performed byM.I.A
4. I Put a Spell On You performed by Nina Simone

Cravings
1. More books
2. Solid new ideas for PF
3. More money, hehe
4. Steak and A1 sauce

Good News, Bad News ...Progress?

2008-10-05T22:10:00.004-04:00

Good news: I'm writing my azz off. Bad news: I'm pretty much going in circles. More Bad News: Hit a wall this weekend about the progression of Pride Fall. More Good News: Smashed the wall down and I'm back to writing.

Here is my progress on the multitude of stories I've started and stopped. *sigh*

Pride Fall- Paranormal/Shifter

2 / 60
(3.3%)

Broken- Controversial/Contemporary

7 / 55
(12.7%)

Pale Moon Rising-Paranormal/Shifter

5 / 60
(8.3%)

How to Kill a Monster-Paranormal

11 / 55
(20.0%)

Negotiator-Contemporary/Suspense

1 / 25
(4.0%)

Awesomely Badass

2008-09-29T19:51:00.005-04:00

Here is my new author banner. Done by the ridiculously talented Mya. Check out her Books A Guardian's Desire, Unnatural Worth, or Obedience Training. All are awesome reads.

Drawing of Three

2008-09-24T22:29:00.000-04:00

Drawing of Three

I am running a contest for a free copy of my newest release from Cacoethes Publishing, G Strain. The rules to enter the contest are simple. Just tell me if this statement is true or false: "Lykurgans are red-skinned giants from planet Lykur."

Hint: You can find out if this is true or not by reading the blurb or excerpt for G Strain, found here: www.cacoethespublishing.net or www.sagewhistler.net.

On October 10, 2008 I will be randomly drawing three names from those of you who have answered correctly. Each winner will receive a pdf copy of G Strain.

Please send all responses to whistlercon@yahoo.com

[deadline for entry October 9, 11:59pm.]

G Strain out Now!

2008-09-18T02:10:00.003-04:00

What hides in your genes?

When Kenano Smith and Jared Mariner awoke in the morning they had no idea that their lives would change forever. Both men are carriers of the G Strain, which make them the perfect candidates for mating on Lykur.

Lykur is the home world of a race of alien warriors known as Lykurgans. The only thing these Lykurgans crave more than a good fight are plentiful mates. War has ravished their planet and sent these dominant, blue beings to the edge of the universe in search of viable mates.

They’ve finally found what they have searched so long for, but there is one thing they did not count on: there is no way to conquer love. It must be freely given, and for Lykurgans and humans it may mean compromise. It may mean sacrifice. It may just mean altering everything they’ve ever believed in.

$4.50 at Cacoethes Publishing House

*For buy link click on the G Strain icon, on the right side of the page, where my books are listed.*

Pictures of the Week # 8

2008-09-10T17:55:00.003-04:00

I have fallen seriously behind posting these, but here is week eight. The theme is Black.

1. Dragon
2. Rose
3. Witch and Cat
4. Bad Day At work

( The pictures are titled, but not owned by Sage Whistler)

Favorites of September

2008-09-05T11:38:00.002-04:00

Books
1. A Helping Hand by Shayla Kersten
2. Orphanage by Robert Burnette
3. Driving Hard by G.A. Hauser
4. Necessary Temptation by A.D. Christoper

Movies
1.Tremors 1,2,3
2.The Fragiles
3.Critters
4.Waterworld

TV
1. Dirty Jobs With Mike Rowe
2. CNN Presidential Campaigns
3. Supernanny
4. Colbert Report

Music
1. Paper Planes by M.I.A.
2. Bust Your Windows by Jazmine Sullivan
3. Goodbye Apathy by OneRepublic
4. Free Fallin'by John Mayer

Cravings
1. Knowing Caleb's release from Cameron Dane
2. Broken Boundaries' release by Evangeline Anderson
3. More enthusiasm to write
4. An end to edits for G Strain

Screams NOOOOOOO!

2008-08-27T21:42:00.003-04:00

I was reading a most excellent book. It was only in the one hundred thirty page range. Things were going along nicely until one of my pet peeves happened BIG time. At which point I would have tossed the book out of a window, but it was on my laptop, so no go. What happened you may wonder? The main characters did not hook up until a serious heavy, CONTINUOUS love making marathon with someone else. Yes, one of the main characters did the horizontal limbo with someone else half the time. I was so peeved. I hate reading stuff like that. Allude to it if you must, but don't have me suffer through it. Ultimately I want the two MAIN characters to get together, so I don't want to be sidetracked with the hot and heavy with a third wheel. The book was entirely too short for that because the love scenes happened more with the third wheel than the main characters which is lik...a tad frustrating in my opinion. I realize I am having like a total spaz fit right now, but I really get into my stories and this kind of broke my heart a little. I don't know how other readers will feel about it. Some may agree with me. Some may shrug, and say it was just fine. Authors have complete and utter free will when it comes to writing and shouldn't be swayed by audiences on what they want to write. As an author I agree. I just wish this book had a warning on it.(which I realize is completely unrealistic, but wanted nonetheless) *sigh* I skipped like fifteen pages worth because of third wheel interaction.

Favorites of August

2008-08-02T01:17:00.003-04:00

Books
1. Slave Boy by Evangeline Anderson
2. Bent by Sean Michael
3. ReneCade by Cameron Dane
4. Crossing Boundaries by Z.A. Maxfield

Movies
1. Undead or Alive (favorite line from the movie. "Why the hell did you bring me a dead baby field mouse?" Hint: Its not a field mouse.haha
2. The Take
3. The Ruins
4. Grindhouse:Planet Terror

Music
1. Moving Mountains by Thrice
2. Goodbye Sympathy by OneRepublic
3. Goodnight Moon by Shavaree
4. Down With the Sickness by Disturbed

TV
1. Cops
2. Dirty Jobs W/Mike Rowe (always)
3. Snapped
4. Oprah

Cravings
1. A good idea
2. Graduation
3. Money
4. Evangeline's next book to come out already. :(

Procrastination

2008-07-28T21:58:00.002-04:00

It's a terrible affliction of mine. In fact I'd say it is my disease. I know what needs to be done and yet I stare, I look, I browse, I eat a sandwich, check email,watch TV, contemplate life, suck in my gut while I look in the mirror, and debate the why I should eat fruit instead of ice cream. My point is, I do everything besides writing. A fan told me today that she wished I had a book out every month. Hah! Me too. I wish I could whip stories together faster than I can scramble an egg. My problem is:boredom. I've got six windows open on my laptop right now as I type this. I can't even read anything. I'm starting to think I need a break, but I've come to one conclusion. I CAN'T STOP WRITING! Having a storyline in my head would drive me insane, and the only time I seem to have them is when I'm off the computer. As soon as i boot it goes POOF, all gone. Grrr! I wish muses could be sold or traded. I'd put mine on e-bay in a heartbeat. Rant over!

Manfix

2008-07-10T23:38:00.003-04:00

I just created a free stories website featuring four of my stories that were previously posted on AFF. I think the site looks pretty cool. I've been working on it all day and all that I have left to do is some major editing. Manfix

Favorites of July

2008-07-03T01:03:00.004-04:00

Books

1. Finding Home by Cameron Dane
2. The Boy Next Door by G.A. Hauser
3. Charlie's Bargain by Evangeline Anderson
4. So Much More Than Naked by DJ Manly

Movies
1. Walle
2. Good Luck Chuck
3. Why Did I Get Married?
4. Jumper

TV
1.Hitler's Pawn (Documentary)
2.Reba
3. Inside America's Prisons
4. Cops

Music
1. Sleep by One Republic
2. Down with the Sickness by Disturbed
3. Ur So Gay by Kati Perry
4. Bust Your Windows by Jazmine Sullivan

Cravings
1. ticket to the Bahamas
2. a new car
3. Graduation
4. A gym membership lol

Scared the Bejeezus out of my big Sis!

2008-06-21T01:57:00.003-04:00

My sister is squeamish! hah That is an understatement. I laughed my head off when she watched the movie "Slither" with me. I actually didn't think she'd be bothered that much by it. We've watched horror movies our entire lives together. I was the one scared when we were little. "Lost World: Jurassic Park" had me losing sleep for days. (yes, I know that isn't exactly horror) "Slither" IMO isn't a horror either. There is too much humor for it to be truly scary. What they go for is the shock factor. I wish I could have video taped my sister launching an assault on the carpet. She flew down so fast I thought someone had tossed a grenade. When the creature first showed itself she gripped my arm and started cursing. One time she even screamed. I know, I know, it was mean of me to laugh, but I couldn't help myself. I'd seen "Slither" about 4x already and I had warned her that is was a gore fest, but she didn't believe me. She made it up until near about the ending when the guy was a heaping mass of congealed humans, then she fled shrieking into the night. My God, I had no idea my sister could run so fast. Lol As for me, well, I guess I've seen so much horror and gore it doesn't really affect me the way it would some people.

I despise Gmail

2008-06-16T22:01:00.003-04:00

There are several things about gmail I don't like, and I'm currently debating whether to make another account. Of course I'll have to keep that one open. *sigh* I've made too many accounts on other sites with sagewhistler@gmail.com to remember all of them. So this is what I can't stand about it.

1. Archive, huh? Where the hell do my emails go when I archive them. ? I thought it meant I was putting them up for later review, but there is no Archive folder. If you Archive them they apparently end up in limbo or somewhere.

2. Folders, suck! I tried to put some of my messages in folders but if I delete them out of inbox they get deleted out of the folder as well. Now I have an overabundance of emails in my inbox and I can't delete crap.

3. Unlike Yahoo, there is no option to see the pics and attachments without the actually manually going to the email. I thought Gmail was supposed to be more high tech.

4. Boring layout. Is there anything more boring than blue puke over a white background?

Things that make you go... hmmmm...

2008-06-10T21:58:00.002-04:00

By	M. Nix "Joyfully Reviewed" -

Joshua and Jaime are identical twins, but with some slight appearance differences that those close to them were able to tell them apart. Their personalities were their biggest difference, Jaime was sweet and easygoing with a smile that put everyone at ease and Joshua was quieter and much more reserved. One thing the twins shared besides their appearance were emotions for each other that went well past the normal feelings of brotherly love. Once the twins revealed their true feelings to each other, the risk of family scorn and social backlash wasn't enough to stop them from acting upon the feelings they both had held back from for so long.
Torn was a story about two people so in sync with one another that if they weren't twins that type of connection with a stranger would be frightening. Jaime and Joshua needed to be with each, no other person would have fit. As taboo a subject as incest is the relationship between Joshua and Jaime was a beautiful one. Having the type of relationship these two embarked on is difficult, there are struggles within themselves to contend with and the struggles of how others will view them, especially family. If you are okay with reading about twincest, which I am, I'm certain you will enjoy Torn just as much as I did.

I never recieved this review personally but I found it on Amazon.com even though I submitted "Torn" to the fine folks at Joyfully reviewed. Am I upset. Hell, no. They gave me five stars. Lol hard to be peeved about a lovely review and a five star rating.

Pictures of the Week #7

2008-06-08T18:24:00.003-04:00

I've been slacking but I'll try and get back into the groove. Theme of this week. Black and White.

New Cover

2008-06-03T15:13:00.002-04:00

Favorites of June

2008-06-01T13:39:00.002-04:00

Books

1. Fledging by Octavia Butler
2. Sully's Heart by Adrianna Dane
3. A Matter of Necessity by T.D. McKinney
4. Fits Like a Glove by Sean Michael (yes, he is one of my favorite authors)

Movies

1. Knocked Up
2.Little Miss Sunshine
3. First Sunday
4. Invasion

TV

1. Deadliest Catch
2. HBO on Demand
3. Golden Girls
4. Dirty Jobs w/Mike Rowe

Songs

1. Sleep by One Republic
2. All Fall Down by One Republic
3. Lilac Wine by Jeff Buckley
4. Nothing Compares to You by Sinead O'Connor

Cravings

1. A good paranormal romance
2. Money to buy as many ebooks as I want *g*
3. My bachelors (one more semester to go)
4. Ratatouille not to be sold out at every store I visit

Projects

2008-05-31T22:22:00.003-04:00

If anyone has paid attention to my ramblings over time you know that I'm a seat-of-my pants type of gal. I have more big dreams and ideas than the circus and things are constantly changing for me. I've completely given up trying to work on one story at a time because I am easily bored and distracted. My mind is like a room full of people and everyone is trying to talk at the same time. Sometimes certain voices drown out others and sometimes they all just scream and I get fed up and take a break. Well... enough of the analogies. What I'm currently working on is like five projects. Some may be finished soon and others much, much later. AnyHOO I've got a story going called "How to Kill a Monster" it's about a young man who has an encounter with evil and returns to his home to find sanctuary in the arms of a former bully. Silly I know, but the story is more about fate then anything. The former bully has his reasons for picking on David (the main character). I thought it would be interesting to write about a person who wasn't always a goody two shoes and if my audience comes to love him the way I do.. well then I've done my job. So back to the story--David runs home to find safety in the strong capable arms of his former bully. The man who used to pick on him wants nothing more than to make up for his past discretions. I won't say anything else until later. Besides I'm not even finished yet. Right now I'm deep into the good stuff. *wink* The second story I started is called "Omega Fall" it will most likely be a short read and I'm toying with the idea of making it the first book of a trilogy--"Beta Rift" and "Alpha Rise" would round out the series. I also have my Needful Things series to get started on. I'm hedging, I know. Just today I had this light bulb go off in my head urging me to write a story called. "Build a B.E.N." Sound familiar? That's cause it is. Build a Bear kind of tipped it off. So far the synopsis is that a young scientist who works for a giant government corporation called Ibram is asked to help destroy evidence of illegal human and machine experimentation. He manages to force himself to destroy the files and documents but there is just one thing he can't bring himself to destroy. B.E.N. Bioengineered-Epigonic-Neohuman. You see the young scientist has been working with B.E.N for months and he has developed feelings for the neohuman that cross the boundaries set by the Ibram coporation. Lastly, I have ideas for a couple of other stories. The plots are still shaky but the names kinda jumped into my head and held on with the tenacity of a rabid dog. "Drop Off" "Lion Down" and "No Frills".

On top of all this I have five stories to finish on AFF. Yeah, I'm swamped but I'm superexcited about the possibilities.

On My Way

2008-05-02T21:52:00.004-04:00

It's the last day of college. I leave tomorrow, and next semester will be my last as an undergrad. As I look back on all the things I have accomplished in the last couple of months, I am surprised and deeply appreciative, and yes, damn proud. I could not have gotten where I was if I hadn't taken up the courage to post on several Myspace groups. It was there that a CEO of an up and coming publishing company discovered me. I had no idea I'd be published this soon, and I still have my doubts about being ready, but it's entirely too late for that now. I have six stories --six little labor of loves and *cough* not so love stories out there for the public to scrutinize. So far, so good. Hopefully I'll continue to write and improve my craft. I have a bizillion ideas in my head, around one hundred and fifty stories I've at least partially started throughout my lifetime, and only ten fingers. It's gonna take time I know, but ...I'm on my way.

Favorites of May

2008-05-01T11:43:00.002-04:00

Books
1. The Last Bite by Evangeline Anderson
2. Six Bad Things by Charlie Huston
3. Already Dead by Charlie Huston
4. The Kiss by G.A Hauser
5. The Partisan by Martin Brant (one extra)

Movies
1. Sweeney Todd The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
2. Across the Universe
3. Forbidden Kingdom
4. Never Scared

TV
1.Orangutan Island
2.Flava of Love
3. Dirty Jobs w/Mike Rowe
4. Celebrity Fit Club

Music
1. Better That We Break by Maroon 5
2. Say All We Need by One republic
3. I Think I'm Paranoid by Garbage
4. Lately by KC and Jojo

Cravings
1. Payton's story from J.L. Langley
2. Another m/m read from Evangeline Anderson YAY!
3. Poser and an instruction manual
4. A book on writing improvement

Yep, I'm a Tigerrrr

2008-04-30T00:00:00.003-04:00

According to the Chinese Zodiac, born in the year 1986=Tiger. Dunno about fortunes but most of this applies to me, I think. heh

Tigers may not be the king of the jungle, but these striped cats are no softies! Magnetic and self-possessed, Tigers are born leaders. They have an air of authority that prompts others to fall in line, which is exactly how they like it. Although they are magnetically charming and fun to be around, Tigers like to go it alone sometimes too. A Tiger's main interest is in following its ambitions -- and maintaining control.

Tigers are courageous beyond compare and generally come out ahead in battle, be it in the boardroom or the bedroom. Seduction is one area where the Tiger is definitely king! Noble and warm-hearted, Tigers have a natural, raw appeal that's extremely attractive to other Signs. They're not just about attraction, though; ever on the side of right, Tigers will fight the good fight to the bitter end if the cause is worthy. Opponents are wise to fear this feline.

A bit of caution is a good thing around Tigers, since they can pounce without warning. They experience mood swings and often feel things more intensely than others, the latter quality being both good and bad. They can react poorly under stress and are prone to emotional outbursts. This Sign's bristling sensitivity can send friend and foe running for cover.

A lesson that Tigers would be well-served to learn is moderation in all things. Once these cats can find their center and direct their considerable energies toward worthwhile endeavors (as opposed to racing through life), they will accomplish much.

Oh, Wow, I Cried

2008-04-25T15:28:00.002-04:00

If anyone knows me they know that I am not the type to cry easily. The only time I get sappy are during heart wrenching moments I see in life or on TV. (I can even know its fiction and I'll still cry.)
Yesterday I was browsing youtube to find the video of the young boy who was bullied in school and sang like an angel. Well I found him, and though his performance made my vision blurry I did not cry...until I saw Paul Potts audition. Now here is a regular Joe. He's not handsome, muscular, charming, or any of the things we rom/ero authors love to write about. He is the real deal: awkward, plain of face, humble, slightly overweight, and imperfect as everyone, even those who 'look' perfect are. I think his performance moved me more than anything I've seen all year, because (at least to me) I could see his hunger for what he was doing. That made him handsome. It made him seven feet tall with giant muscles, because he was trembling, and yet he did it anyway. Paul sung Nessun Darma, which I had never heard before. I was not into opera, but after his audition it became an instant favorite. I looked up the translation of this Italian lyrics in the English version and it is perhaps the most romantic words I've ever read. So do yourself a favor and check it out. But remember to keep a tissue handy. I still cry every time I watch it, which has been about a dozen times. *g*

Paperback

2008-04-23T10:35:00.002-04:00

I've been draining my account buying ebooks for some time now, and I've probably only purchased two or three paperbacks the entire year of 2007, but finally I went onto B&N and bought some books. They had some of my favorite authors in the bargain section, which means they were only $3.98. I purchased a hardcover by Christine Feehan for just that price. *grin*

I also bought "Me Talk Pretty One Day" by David Sedaris, "Brokeback Mountain" by Anne Proulx, "Fledgling" by Octavia Butler, "Nauti Boy" by Lora Leigh, and "Rainbow Boys" by Alex Sanchez. I'm still debating when I'm going to purchase "Want Me" by Rowan McBride.

Stop Moping

2008-04-16T11:17:00.003-04:00

Have you ever been surrounded by people that mope all the time? People that are so depressed and saddened that it seems like a dark cloud hangs over their head? Well, I'm stuck in a rut I can't get out of, and its slowly depressing me too. You see, I'm in college, and most of my friends either claim depression or manifest symptoms of this epidemic. Honestly, until I came to ECSU I never knew there were so many people that were chronically pessimistic. It is very draining, trying to cheer everyone up, and I have to be the levelheaded person because no one else is. I've had long drawn out conversations about clinical depression. Now, I do believes it exists, but I can't seem to tell the difference between a legit depression and just being pessimistic and moody. I mean, COME ON, all the time? People are walking around confessing to having the worst life on the planet and yet they eat, sleep in a bed, ARE attending COLLEGE to get a better education. I'd say we have a leg up on about sixty percent of the population here, ladies n' gentlemen. We live in America for cripes sakes, not Cuba, or Afghanistan. We are not dodging bullets, or running for our lives. We have a few tests and some classes, a midterm and final. We are free to do what we want! So why the moping and why the dejected face? How come, everytime the sun comes out, you expect it to rain? I can't get my head wrapped around it. Suddenly, I am wishing for the comfort of home and my family: a place where we laughed or cried, and moved on. Most of the time it was filled with laughter. If you were bored, you went out and did something. There was definitely no time to sit and be a moper. Ultimately, I'm thinking, that moping is a viscious cycle. I mean, how can you possibly feel any better, if you always believe you won't?

Anyway, I've ranted enough. I'm off to emerse myself in a crowd of mopers again, because they are my friends, and I feel obligated to help them muddle through, yet, again.

Remakes from Hades

2008-04-08T17:25:00.004-04:00

On Sunday I purchased the old version of"Hairspray", and while I was in the store I started thinking about all remakes going on these days. I'm not sure why Hollywood feels the need to remake old classics. For the most part they were all perfect the first time they were made, and they don't even choose to make over movies that could be improved by our technology advancements. I found three movies in particular which I sincerely dislike the makeovers: "Hairspray", "Annie" and "The Shining". On the other hand some examples of successfully remade movies IMO are "The Parent Trap", "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" and "The Hills Have Eyes". Yeah, I know gory, Lol but I'm an action and horror fan so what can I say? With all the 'fantabolous' books out there that have interesting plots and unforgettable characters I know film makers could do alot better than remakes. I mean if the first was a success, then honestly what is the point?

Torn in Print

2008-04-07T11:56:00.000-04:00

Woot! I got my first copy of Torn in the mail a few days ago. Needless to say I'm super syched! I have to call and get my free copies sent as well. I'm thinking about having a contest to give away two free books, but I'm going to have to hold off for a minute, while I finish up other projects.

Pictures of the Week #6

2008-04-06T22:14:00.006-04:00

This week's theme is water!

Mood

2008-04-03T21:05:00.005-04:00

This pic sums up my mood today. " Pretty, Pretty, by Littlemewhatever at Deviantart.com"

Favorites of April

2008-04-02T00:23:00.003-04:00

Books
1. Strongman by Denise Rossetti
2. Ghost by Sean Michael
3. Windswept by Kate Steele
4. Velvet Need by Sean Michael

Movies
1. Across the Universe
2. No Country for Old Men
3. The Last King of Scotland
4. Grindhouse

TV
1. American Idol
2. The Boondocks
3. Make Me a Supermodel
4. Chimp Eden

Music
1. Love, Love, Love by As Tall as Lions
2. Strange Fruit by Nina Simone (one of the most moving songs I've ever heard)
3. I Don't have anything by Nina Simone
4. Search and Destroy by Iggy

Craving
1. A story for McCabe in J.L Langley's Ranch Series
2. An end to the G-Strain
3. An 'A' in Juvenile Justice
4. The movie Ratatoutille

No Critique Buddy

2008-04-01T17:35:00.003-04:00

I'm so in need of a critique buddy, someone who loves to read and write and has a good sense of what works. I would prefer someone who has published also, but I have no idea how to go about obtaining one. I actually had five critique partners when I wrote the story "All I Want For Christmas", but somehow three of them fell by the wayside. One of the two left turned out to be under eighteen and her mother wrote me an email asking me not to have contact with her daughter. I was soooo embarrassed and a tad bit upset she had lied to me when I made it abundantly clear that I wanted people eighteen and over. I even found her on a website where you have to sign a contract that you are a legal adult. The last critique partner I had just stopped contacting me after the completion of the story. I have to imagine that life finally caught up with him, but it still sucks. So who do I go to to ask opinions about what is and isn't working? Myself of course. When you buy my story it hasn't been screen tested or sliced and diced. The publishers I work for usually have me correct technical errors and thats all, but I wish I had someone to push me to do even better. *sigh*

Trippin' across the World

2008-03-31T15:23:00.003-04:00

I haven't been to many places, but I made a promise to myself that before I passed from this great Earth (hopefully at the ripe old age of 104) I would travel to each one of the continents. My friend and I decided we wanted to trek across the Earth sooner then later. So in the summer of 2009 we plan to go to Europe for a 19 day excursion. The trip will be tour guided and it includes a visit to Germany, Spain, and Italy. Yay! Since the trip is running up to around $4,000 I'm going to start saving right away. I'm super excited, and I know that if I don't go next summer I will go in 2010. Maybe I'll even get inspired by some of the towns we visit. I plan to bring a video camera and record the entire thing.